Where It All Began

Xander didn't just hate public school; he despised it.

For one, it was too big. It was too big in the sense that it was too grand, too busy, too much going on, but Xander had also almost been late to several of his classes just because the very school itself was too big. Getting from one class to the next proved challenging. While Xander was quick on his feet, he was still much smaller than everyone else at the school, so bulldozing through the crowd was out of the question. He had to duck and dodge to get anywhere, which often led him too far astray from where he actually needed to be. The school's layout made no sense.

Then there was the issue of the classes themselves. For the most part, Xander didn't mind being in class. He understood how it was different from homeschool, and this came with some positives and some negatives. One major positive was the desks. Xander had never used a desk before to do his work; it had always been at the kitchen table. He liked the way the top lifted up, giving him ample storage for his belongings. Such an organizational system gave him a scrap of tranquility that he would ride through the rest of the day. The teachers were all pretty nice, and his work load seemed manageable. One downside, he realized, to not being homeschooled was that he couldn't use the bathroom whenever he wanted. This would require a hall pass, and Xander decided that it was in his best interest to just hold it. Another major downside was getting used to sharing class with other students.

He had never shared his classes with other children before, and he quickly found that he preferred not to. Never once in his life had he endured the raw terror of standing up in front of a bunch of kids and stating his name and one interesting fact about himself. And for some reason, teachers seemed to enjoy this godless ritual, because so far the process had repeated at the start of every class. During his first class, he could barely pay attention to the rest of the rest of the introductions while his mind spiraled, trying to come up with something interesting to say. He eventually settled on "I have a pet cat named Mittens" (He didn't, but he figured that sharing an animal fact would be his safest choice). Even though he came prepared, it didn't make his introduction any less terrifying.

He stood at his desk in Mrs. Janssen's literature class, feeling his mouth go dry. He was, in fact, the only one standing in Mrs. Janssen's class, aside from Mrs. Janssen herself. She stood at the front of the room, her hands gracefully clasped in front of her.

My name is Xander and I have a pet cat named Mittens. Just say that. Just say that!

"Um..." he stammered, looking out at the sea of eyes on him, watching, waiting. He hated being stared at. "I... um..."

"Hey," Mrs. Janssen said. "Just look at me."

Xander's eyes darted to the front of the room where she stood as he tried to control his breathing. He was going to faint. He was going to faint in front of the whole class.

Mrs. Janssen smiled. "Just like how you introduced yourself to me this morning, remember? It's just you and me."

Xander took a breath. For a moment, he put himself back where he had been that morning, in the same classroom, same position, with only himself and Mrs. Janssen in the room. He focused on her gentle smile, the way it just slightly sent creases to the corners of her eyes.

"M-My name is Xander."

"Hi, Xander! It's nice to meet you!"

"I have a pet cat named Mittens."

This elicited a few chuckles from the other students. Xander quickly dropped back down to his seat, embarrassment rising as he realized this was not how conversations were to go. Mrs. Janssen's smile widened, a genuine smile, and she fixed him with a quick double thumbs-up. He immediately felt better.

The rest of the class commenced as Mrs. Janssen gave an introduction of the course, a syllabus and calendar (already providing more materials for organization than Xander's first block teacher), before getting right into work. Xander liked Mrs. Janssen, and he liked her class. She was engaging, pacing back and forth as she lectured, making eye contact, and engaging the room, even if not everyone wanted to be engaged. She maintained that bright and cheerful tone she had used with Xander earlier that morning, her passion for the subject infectious. Before class, Xander was uncertain if he even liked literature–but he was now.

"Your homework for tonight," Mrs. Janssen said as the class was coming to a close, "is an essay."

A groan sounded through the room. Xander sat up straighter, making sure he paid attention to the details of this assignment.

"Yeah, yeah," Mrs. Janssen waved her hand at the groaning students. "I know. But this is just for me to get a measure of where everybody stands with writing. You are to conduct a page-long essay about a challenge you faced this summer, and how you overcame it. Just a page, nothing too serious. I'm only counting this as a homework grade, meaning it doesn't matter how well you do, only if you did it."

Xander's mind already started spinning, thinking of how he would respond to the prompt. He liked Mrs. Janssen, and he was afraid he might have made himself look stupid in front of her at the beginning of class. He wished he hadn't lied about having a cat.

This would be his opportunity to fix that. He would take his time to write the best essay he could conjure. He'd had his fair share of challenges over the summer; he just had to pick one. Moving to a new state to go to public school for the first time seemed like the most obvious.

And how you overcame it.

Xander wasn't sure about the second part. In his opinion, he was still actively facing this challenge, every moment he spent at school.

But Mrs. Janssen helped me overcome it, a little bit.

Yes, this was good.

Xander was never one for insincere flattery. It felt awkward, wrong coming from him. But this wasn't flattery; he had already told a stupid lie, now he had the chance to tell the most sincere truth. This paper was going to be good.

The ear-splitting school bell punctuated Xander's thoughts.

"Well, that's lunch," Mrs. Janssen announced. "I'm looking forward to seeing what you've written for me tomorrow. Have a great first day of school, everyone!"