Whatever It Takes

"So what are you doing besides being all sad and mopey?" she asked walking into the research room seeing her friend spaced out in front of a computer screen.

"What?" Meredith replied turning her attention with a furrowed brow. "I'm not being all sad and mopey, I'm researching my surgery."

"You're sad and mopey and its starting to get on everyone's nerves." She replied slouching into a chair. "Barbie's even talking about setting you up on a date to 'cheer you up'."

"What!" Meredith gasped

"Izzy's even thinking about Psych guy."

"I don't need to be set up on a date, I'm busy and I.. I can find my own date."

"Right."

"What?" she frowned "I can, and I did. A few weeks ago at Joe's."

"What the Vet?" Christina frowned in disapproval "It wasn't a date, he knocked over your drink and he bought you a new one. Besides, he isn't even a real doctor." Meredith slowly turned her head back to the screen and let out a sigh as she sunk back into her chair and chewed on her bottom lip like she did when she was deep in thought.

"Am I really all that sad and mopey Christina?" she mumbled in a low voice.

"Yes." Christina confirmed "But for what its worth I find it charming."

"Why cant people just accept the fact that I like to be alone?"

"Why do you want to be alone?" she asked only to be met with a stare "Mer, you work non-stop and its not like you have to, you have natural talent. Its not like you have to work all that hard to be the kind of surgeon you are. When you came here you were all to yourself and I thought you were just shy but now its starting to freak me out a little. I get that you want to be alone but what I don't get is why. You're starting to look like some crazy person that's going to snap and kill everyone."

"Maybe you should be the one to go out with psych guy, you're starting to sound a lot like him."

"Whatever."

"I think it would be cute, a neuro surgeon and a shrink."

"You're deranged." She replied as she stood up and started for the door "Just make sure you give me a heads up the day you go all postal on the place."

"I'll send you a postcard."

"It wouldn't kill you to be happy you know." Christina sighed as she leaned in the door frame.

"Happiness is overrated." Meredith replied "But my patient wont be very happy if I don't perform his cardio-pulmonary bypass soon." Christina nodded and let out a short sigh as she started to turn around in the doorway, "Maybe there's a reason."

"What?" Christina asked startled at the confession, she looked at her friend noticing the deep fatigue and emotion in her blue-green eyes.

"Maybe there's a reason I'm not happy." She stated again "Maybe there's something. But its my something, people have a right to be sad and not have to tell the world about it. I have a right to be down and not have people trying to set me up on dates, I have.. I have a right to just be me."

"I know." Christina said softly "But, its not me you have to convince."

Meredith rolled her eyes as she watched her friend leave the doorway, she sat in the chair sighing to herself as she self examined her feelings. Maybe she was a little depressed than normal. But with all she'd been through she had a right to be and, especially this week.