the analyst - (NEWT)

three.

"i want to be able to remember her newt. i want to be able to hear her laugh, wipe her tears, i want to know her, and i hope she doesn't hate me because i don't." she finally relaxes, her body unwinding and her sobs shift into silent tears.

"even though i never knew her i can assure you she could never hate you" he affirms, he is no longer sitting with his legs crisscrossed. the boy was sitting directly in front of her, sitting in his ankles. even though it didn't look like much, yn could feel the overwhelming sincerity of the action and she finally finds herself looking back at newt.

after what felt like an eternity (in reality it was just a few seconds), yn looks away and wipes her tears once more, picking at the grass shamefully.

"i should go back to sleep... big day tomorrow" and she stands up abruptly, making her way back to the homestead in hopes of getting a proper night of sleep. newt was left still sitting on his ankles in the deadheads and he runs a frustrated hand over his face before also getting up and trekking towards his hammock.

• • •

the next time yn is awoken, she finds alby had woken her up, not newt. guiltily, she admits to herself that she liked it better that way; she wasn't entirely sure if she wanted to talk to newt after she had spilled her guts out to him in the spur of the moment. sure, she greatly appreciated his support but with his support probably also came different treatment. she supposes the next time she will talk to newt will just be whenever it's necessary and she was content with that.

"morning greenie, you ready for a day in the slicers?" he greets, eying her hammock curiously.

"it's yn..." she speaks groggily, being awake but her eyes refusing to open.

"well then, it's nice to finally be formally introduced to you, yn." she responds with a small, dazed smile.

the girl sits up and swings her legs over the side of the hammock, her feet making contact with the cold wood. she moves over towards her shoes, slips them on, and tucks her hair behind her ears; she wishes she had the opportunity to shower first but she'll later find out she'd prefer to have it after her time with the slicers.

"what do you say we build you your own room? aren't you uncomfortable out here?" the girl freezes for a moment, and nods slowly.

"yeah... that would be nice actually..."

"great, i'll talk to gally about it." he smiles, she thinks a silly memory had made its way to the front of his brain considering he laughs lightly at the mention of this gally.

"go on, eat your breakfast, you're going to need a lot of energy." yn will come to later regret eating her breakfast.

her first few hours in, yn hadn't minded being a slicer; even if the name slightly intimidated her. this was until she had to scrape up animal klunk and visited the blood house. she swore she felt her meal coming back up when she saw the animal carcasses hung up around the building, but she forced it back down. winston was nice though, she thought. but even his warm and welcoming attitude could not take away from the eeriness of the room; she hopes winston's cheeky grins at her as he taught her how to cut up a pig meant that he knew this job was not her fit.

• • •

yn decides to skip dinner; partly in fear she might choke it back up after the events of today, or she'll see newt and he'll give her a warmer smile than usual. of course, it wasn't that she hated newt himself; rather, she hated how hard it was to stray away from him. she easily fell apart around him and she figured it was only a matter of time before she caves and treats him as more than a stranger. she instead heads to the showers, eager to get the smell of blood, animal klunk, and the smell of raw meat off of her.