where dreams go

"I like your eyes."

And there she goes blushing. For a second, the universe slowed down and the way the gentle creasing of her smile from the edge of her cheekbones that angles her smile towards her eyes and everything was so beautiful.

She.

She was.

She is.

She still is beautiful.

"That's a fancy way to get yourself out of this mess, doofus. Now, by applying the formula on the Sheets, you'll get the summed up amount for the taxes."

Taxes?

Oh yeah, she's teaching me Accountings. She's really smart.

She's always been smarter. Teaching me from the simplest Maths to Accounts and Economics.

God was I lucky.

"You're really smart."

"Again, I'm flattered but we have got to finish this before 4. I've got to get home by then."

Oh yeah, her parents are a bit strict. Her dad particularly. Even though he's not around much but he expects her to be home before 5.

"We have at least an hour. Let me remember your face before we leave."

"You're really an awful sweet talker."

She says that but then she gazes into me.

If I had to describe for every time our eyes locked, my heart didn't even skip a beat, a beautifully paused moment, just us, and how she smile that reveals her braces, how her large glasses are slightly dropped to the tip of her nose, how the wind blows her sweet fragrance, how she would always look like an angel sent from Heaven's up above just to guide me through life.

"That's enough, now key in the formula and make sure you remember the steps. I can't help you during the exams."

"Yeah, yeah. I got it. So when's your driver coming to pick you up?"

"Well he usually comes 15 minutes early, so we pretty much have half an hour before we wrap this up."

I think I'm falling for her.

I am aren't I?

I'm falling so hard for someone I used as a cushion after being dumped for her ex-classmate.

But dear God, did she cushioned my fall.

I thought I was sinking, and there she was as my savior.

I'm thinking of ways that I could delay her just a bit more as she explains how next week will be filled with quizzes.

And all I am doing is remembering every detail of her face, imprinting her voice in my head and making sure that just maybe, even though the chances of her falling for me is tinier than slim, just maybe, if she had the same feelings that I have for her.

"Hey! Focus. I can see in your eyes that you're daydreaming."

"I am! But can you smile once more? I'm trying hard not to forget any details about you."

"Maybe for once, if you put that much effort in your studies, I wouldn't have to be your mentor."

And again, she puts me in a trance. She is so mesmerizing.

And I'm lucky to be that guy who gets to spend whatever that's left of my life before shit hits the fan.

These years, maybe months, or days, are probably the most memorable of them all.

"Alrighty then, finally we finished what we had planned for days now. I got to get going. And please for your sake, and the deal we made, do your homework and stop smoking, you can never get any girl with that odor."

You're right. I won't get any girls. Because all that I've ever wanted was you. And you got one more thing wrong, I already stopped smoking when you said you hated guys who smoke.

Funny how love works.

I used to think smoking made me look cool.

Then you came, and I despised smoking.

Then you came, I kinda enjoyed studying.

Then you came, I find a purpose.

Then you went away.