Hard Edges || Mandalorian X Reader

"Y/n?"

His voice pulls you out of your trance. What time is it?

"Sorry, what?"

"We landed?" Din is looking down at you, hand outstretched.

You stare at his gloved hand. "Yes. Right." You place yours in his and he pulls you gently up from your seat. He keeps hold of your hand, head tilting to the side. "You okay? You've been quiet since we left Trask." He asks, his voice soft.

You muster a quick smile. "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" You try to duck past him but his hand closes tighter on yours, catching you in place.

He says nothing, just stares at you. Your eyes follow every groove and edge in his armour, avoiding the slit in his helmet. You can feel the air getting heavier under this gaze. "I was just wondering...what you look like."

"You've stared out that window in silence for the last three days because you don't know what I look like?" His grip loosens on your wrist.

You close your eyes. Guilt hits you hard. You have barely spoken to him, barely touched him, since seeing those other mandos show their faces. Your mind has been reeling. If there are mandos who show their faces, why wont Din show you his? And why would he tell you none do? Were they not real Mandalorians, or is Din lying to you?  You give a resigned sigh, "Yeah."

"Would it matter?"

Your eyes flick open and straight to the visor, a  crinkle in your brow. "No. I just... I was just... thinking. That's all." You give him a half hearted smile and walk towards the ladder.

"Brown." The tightness in his voice stops you in your tracks.

You look back over your shoulder at him.

"My eyes. They are brown." his voice cracks and you feel it in your chest.

"Brown like... amber? Or brown like... caf?"

"Caf."

"I like caf."

"I know." He strides over to you, taking your face in your hands. "I know you."

Din pulls you close to him, wrapping his arms around you and you melt into the strength of them, breathing in his scent. You aren't sure how long you stay just like that.

"We should go." He finally mumbles.

"We?"

"Well, can't have you wandering off again. Besides I know someone here, you'll like him."

. . .

Din is right. You and Kuiil are fast friends. He is so warm and kind underneath that gruff, very matter-of-fact shell (not unlike someone else you know). He welcomes the three of you into his home with open arms, and you have been doing your best to be helpful to him to repay his hospitality. Kuiil is amazing - you know your way around engines and circuitry but Kuiil, he has probably forgotten more than you ever knew.

It has been days since Din left to find his bounty and in that time you have shown Kuiil all the adjustments and repairs you have done to the Crest. He always smiles and praises you, even though you felt a bit like a child with their school science project.  He shows you the droid he is repairing - an old IG unit he picked from the desert. When you ask for help to fix up Grogu's pod he offers instead to help you fabricate a whole new one - and the two of you finish it beautifully in no time.

As much fun as it is learning from Kuiil, what surprises you the most is how much you enjoy the blurrgs. They are funny creatures. They look like fish with legs, but they are so sweet and funny. Kuiil shows you how to care for them, and doing so is a great distraction from your previous worries.

Until night, when doubt clouds your mind and makes sleep hard to find.

Why would Din lie?
Or did he just not know?
Maybe they weren't Mandalorians?
Maybe there are different kinds?
Or maybe he just prefers it this way?
Maybe this is all he wants?
Maybe its just sex?
Is this how it will always be, never truly knowing him?
Is it enough?

You try, but can't help yourself from subjecting Kuiil to your barrage of questions. He tells you all he knows about the force and the Jedi one night as you watch the baby play. Kuiil has lived many times longer than any human, and was enslaved by the empire during the war - he has heard of many such things.

Tonight you are sitting on the hill with Kuiil, watching the sun set over the valley, the blurrgs peacefully munching below you.

"Kuiil? Can I ask you something?"

"You may."

"What do you know about Mandalorians?"

"They were great warriors, bound by honour and by Creed. The Empire, unable to defeat them sought to destroy them. Their planet was destroyed during The Purge. A great civilization, much like mine, destroyed by hate."

You can only nod in response.

"I have known only a few in my time, though none the way you do." Kuiil points to the familiar shape on the horizon, the last rays of sunlight glinting off the Beskar armour.

"As much as you could know someone you've never even seen." You say with a sigh.

Kuiil waves you off. "How many have you seen with your eyes and never truly known? One does not need to see the face of another to know them." He places a hand on your arm. "Nor to love them."

You start to speak but nothing comes out.

"I have spoken." Kuiil pats your arm before getting up and wandering off.

....

You sit in the silence, losing complete track of time staring into the distance as the last streaks of light fade from the sky. A sudden movement in your peripheral breaks your trance and you look over to see Din settling himself next to you. He draws one knee up, resting his arm on and looks out over the valley as you were.

"Thinking about it again?" He sounds far away.

You don't answer, and he doesn't say anything else. The two of you just sit side by side, quietly watching the stars appear in the sky.

You close your eyes, decided.

You take a deep breath in.

"I think maybe there is more than one way to see a person- to see who a person truly is - to... know them. And Din," your voice cracks, "Din I see you. I know you." You turn to him, his gaze meeting yours. "You." You place a hand on his chest. "I don't need to know what you look like to know who you are. Din I know you in the dark, in a crowded room, helmet - no helmet, I would know you blind." Your voice is barely a whisper now. "Because I see you, I know you - in here." You take his hand and place it on your chest.

He stares at his hand on your chest, perfectly still as your lungs scream for breath but you are unable to remember how.

"At least... I feel like I know you... or felt..." Slowly he drags his visor to meet your eyes, they are stinging with tears making it hard to see. "But Din, I---" 

You barely make out the motion in time and squeeze you eyes shut - you catch a blurred flash of caf colored eyes when Din flings his helmet to the ground and crashes his lips to yours.