The Last One | Negan

Judith insisted on staying and watching, while I cut Daryl's hair. And where Judith was, Cherry definitely followed.

"Do you have a particular idea in mind or...?" I asked him, assessing his mop of hair.

"Nah." He said and looked at me in the reflection of the mirror. "Do whatever ya want."

"Maybe you can leave a little strand here on the back so we can tie a braid." Judith chimed in and pointed toward Daryl's neck.

"Yeah? Wanna put a bow on it too?" Daryl reached out to shuffle the top of her head.
I laughed at them and started cutting, separating his hair into sections and combing it through.

"Daryl wants to look cute for his crush." I teased, shooting him a naughty glance.

Judith, of course, reacted just the way I thought she would.
"Crush?!" She exclaimed with wide eyes and clasped her little hands together. "Who is she?"

Daryl grunted in annoyance.
"I don't have a crush." He said, but under her gaze, he faltered. "Oh, alright. She's from Hilltop, you haven't seen her."

"Can I meet her soon?" Judith pressed and hopped on the bathroom counter to sit on top.

"We'll see about that, kiddo." Daryl winked at her. "If you listen and are good."

Judith remained silent for a while, tilting her head. Daryl's brown hair was falling on the floor in clumps as I worked my way around his head.

"I know who has a crush on you." Judith suddenly said, looking at me.

"Yeah?" I inquired, glancing at her quickly.

"Yes. I'm positively sure." She beamed. "Justin has a crush on you."

Daryl huffed a laugh and I scolded him not to move.
"Yeah? Why do you think so?" I asked her.

"Because he always looks at you all lovey-dovey." She replied with a small smile. "And he always wants to help you and be around you."

"You're very observant, aren't you?" I smiled at her.

"I am." She replied. "Maybe you should go out with him."

Daryl again shook with laughter and earned a slap behind the neck from me.
"I'll cut your ear off if you don't stay still." I chastised him.

"Lil Asskicker's right, why don't you go out with him?" He stared at me in the mirror with a lopsided grin.
I sighed in annoyance and focused on my work.

"You and Lil Asskicker can mind your own business," I said.

They both giggled.
"I actually wanted to talk to you and Rick about something," I said after a while, so I could steer the conversation away from my love life.

"What?" Daryl caught one strand of hair that fell onto his lap and started playing with it.

"I want to start going out again. Scouting, scavenging, going on runs. Hunting. I wanna be up on the fence again." I sighed and pursed my lips. "I've been in for too long."

"Didn't you just say yesterday that you wanted to be the, ugh...the 'caring type'? What made you change your mind?" Daryl asked, eyeing me cautiously.

"What's the caring type?" Judith asked, swinging her legs from the counter.

"It's...those are the people that stay inside the community and take care of everything like food, laundry, gardening, taking care of the animals like in Ezekiel's place. Those kind of things." I explained to her.

"I don't want to do that, I want to be like you and Dad. And Daryl." She declared, tilting her chin up.

"You need to grow up first, baby," I said. "You may change your mind in the future."

"I won't."

"But you like animals, don't you want to care for them?"

"I like animals, but I want to keep our home safe from bad people." She replied confidently. "Like you do. You make sure we're safe."

I sighed heavily. I didn't know how to answer her.

"So you wanna go back to your old self now?" Daryl interrupted the silence.

"Yeah. I do."

"No more staying home and planting tulips then?"

"I can do both."

"I think you should go with Daryl more often," Judith said. "You're good in finding things and killing...things."

"Thank you for your evaluation of my skills." I raised my brows at her.
Judith only shrugged. What a kid. Growing up way too fast.

"You're in luck, we're going out on Friday," Daryl said. "Wanna come? As in...ugh, as in your former position."

"As in second in charge?" I looked at him in disbelief.

"Yeah. You need to...have more responsibilities for you to get back in shape."

"I don't know if..."

"You should." Judith again chimed in with her sweet voice. "Dad really wants you back on your post. I've heard him saying that multiple times."

"Does he?" I dusted off some hairs from Daryl's neck and stepped back a bit so I could examine my work. "I'll do it then. Not only for Dad but for you too."

"Great." She smiled at me.

"You're ready, bestie," I said and patted Daryl's shoulders.

He leaned forward to look at himself in the mirror.

"You somehow managed to make me look like I'm 26 again." He chuckled.

"I think you look very handsome," Judith said and reached out to touch his hair.

I laughed wholeheartedly.
"I think so too."

I tried to give him the same haircut he had when we first met, just a bit longer maybe, and succeeded miraculously. It suited his face. I liked him like that.

"Thank you." Daryl stood up from the chair and dusted off the rest of the hairs from himself.

"You're welcome," I replied and reached for the broom so I could clean up.

"Nah, let me do that." He snatched the broom from my hands. "I'll be the 'caring type' now."

I laughed at him and helped Judith jump off the counter.
"Alright then, big guy. We're gonna go make some lunch."

Me and Judith went downstairs and I started preparing the ingredients I needed. In the last year, I learned how to cook more than two things and became the master of the perfect vegetable cream soup. Thanks to Ezekiel, we had some dairy products in hand, which was great, because this particular soup needed just a drop of milk.

Later that day, I talked with Rick when he finally came home. He agreed to the idea of me going on that run with Daryl and the rest on Friday but insisted that before I stepped into my position again, I needed to go out with him so he could see for himself if I did or didn't, indeed, lose my touch. To examine how I reacted in a real situation after that time of staying behind the walls.

We did that, went to the nearest town, which of course we had scavenged to the last toothpick, but stumbled upon some walkers. We fought them off and Rick was pleased with how I did. That sealed the deal of me leading the group on Friday.

I truly needed to get back to myself.
It was about damn time.
Not that I didn't like staying in – I did. I needed that. Maybe I also needed to rediscover all those parts of myself, that I acted like didn't exist for so long. A cathartic experience, that's what that year was. Almost everyone from our group went through that and I always wondered why. How? How did they let themselves sulk in their own thoughts, let themselves be depressed, become weak? Because as far as I was concerned, you mustn't be weak. Not for a moment, not ever. Otherwise, you'd be dead. But now I've come to realize that having weaknesses, going through these things, dealing with those emotions...That was what made you strong.