Another Shitty Day in Hell - Sir Pentious x Reader

"Uh, excuse me," You took a look at his fancy attire, judging what you should call him for now. "...sir, but I never did catch your name. What is it?"

The snake looked at you, dumbfounded.

"What?" He said. "What do you mean you don't know my name? I am THE Sir Pentious-s-s! Renowned inventor!!" he boasted, puffing his chest out. He stayed like that for a moment before bowing politely, looking at you from below his...sentient top hat? Another odd thing you noticed that relates to him.

"And you are?"

For a literal snake, he had surprisingly good etiquette. But that's how snakes are. They betray you when you least expect it. You hesitantly told him your name.

"(Y/N)(L/N). But you can just call me (Y/N)."

He came back up from the bow and tilted his head lightly, grinning again. You swore you saw a sparkle on his fang(s) despite there being no sun in hell. Perhaps it was the constant fire down there.

"Ah, what an absolutely beautiful name! May I as-s-sk where you got it?"

You furrowed your brows, a tad bit confused. What kind of question was that?

"Uh, my mom?" You warily answered. "Who else would I get it from?"

"Oh. I jus-s-st thought that...." he paused for a second. "Nevermind. Shall I take you on a tour of the es-s-state?"

Figuring that he probably wasn't going to take no for an answer, you extended your hand towards the door. "Lead the way, Sir."

"Excellent." He hissed. You picked up your box of belongings and followed him as he entered the estate.

He swung the door open with great flair, making his entrance known to whoever was in the house.

Stepping in after him, you were breath-taken when you saw the grand architecture. The surprisingly intact wooden floorboards creaked underneath your foot as you walked around a bit.

In front of you stood maybe the biggest living room you'd ever seen in your life. Most of the furniture was painted black, and some had red velvet highlights. The walls were ash grey. A taxidermied polar bear rug stood beneath your feet. You had a sneaking suspicion it was once a person down here.

A large painting hung above a red velvet sofa. The painting was of Sir Pentious himself, depicted in quite a flattering manner.

The painting showed the snake as some sort of old army general. It kind of reminded you of Napoleon. In the painting, he had yet another ridiculous hat on. He was also sitting upon a beautiful white stallion.

"This," He started, snapping you out of your train of thought. "Is where you will spend your days-s-s until I either fire you or you quit."

Nodding, you got the feeling he was implying a third option. You then recalled what the poster said about your work hours. At least your insurance was paid.

Feeling his gaze burning into the back of your skull, You turned your head and realized that Sir Pentious was looking down at you distastefully, a frown on his serpentine face.

"The advertis-s-sment tell you to dress elegantly, did it not?" He hissed lightly, a spark of annoyance in his voice.

"Oh." You breathed. "Well you didn't point it out at the door so I assumed that-"