In Between Us || Zhanyi

A Silent Resolve

He had tried, in his own quiet way, to make this place feel like a home. Not for himself, but for Zhan. Maybe for them. As he walked out, it gnawed to him every corner, every room, carried a trace of him. The curtains, the bookshelves, the small decorations—it was him who had arranged it all. He stood in the kitchen, his hand resting on the counter he had cleaned every night. 

He knew this place wasn't his, yet he had cared for it. Every day, without question, he maintained a space he never thought was truly his to claim. The irony wasn't lost on his. This apartment, this life—it had been a reflection of his unwilled dedication. He had poured herself into it, silently, without realizing that each act of care was a plea he never spoke out loud. A plea for belonging, for connection.

After spending a long, reflective hour under the scalding shower in the dorm's communal bathroom, Yibo felt a sense of resolve. The hot water washed away the remnants of his tears, and with each droplet, he let go of the pain bit by bit. He couldn't allow his personal life to bleed into his academic world anymore. If Zhan couldn't see him as a partner, then Yibo would force himself to hard, so that Zhan could at least him as a student who excelled. Because for Yibo, it was only his academics where he had his own control.

He vowed to excel in every test, every assignment, and every exam with the highest marks possible. He'd prove to Zhan that he wasn't just the quiet, compliant boy in the background of their marriage. He was more than that, and Zhan would see it.

But before he could fully commit to living in the dorm, Yibo knew he had to inform Zhan. That was his nature—always seeking approval, always afraid to step too far without permission. Despite how badly things had turned between them, Yibo still respected Zhan, Zhan was still his husband and had every right over him, he wanted his blessing, no matter how much it pained him.

However, Zhan had made it clear long before that personal matters were not to be brought up on campus. He was strict about boundaries, and more recently, Zhan had even barred Yibo from visiting him after hours without permission. A line had been drawn between their roles as husband-husband and professor-student, and Yibo had no choice but to obey it.

And yet, telling Zhan something like this over the phone didn't feel right either. This wasn't just about moving rooms; but he had certain things to inform Zhan. He knew Zhan was a self-sufficient man and didn't need his assistant, maybe Zhan won't be bothered the slightest because of his absence but still a part of him cared for his husband too much and wanted to say something. Yibo wanted to face Zhan when he said it. He wanted to see Zhan's reaction.............maybe, just maybe there was a tiny hope that Zhan would stop him. Maybe Zhan asked him to stay back or at least Zhan said something that could help him to hold on their relationship. 

After much internal debate, Yibo decided to meet Zhan at the university, despite the risk of angering him. He needed Zhan to hear this from him directly. So, that afternoon, Yibo made his way to Zhan's office, his steps hesitant yet purposeful.

As he approached the familiar wooden door of Zhan's office, Yibo paused. His hand hovered near the door, ready to knock. But just as he leaned closer, he noticed something odd. The door wasn't fully closed. It was slightly ajar, leaving a thin gap between the frame.

Curiosity prickled at him, but more than that, a sense of unease crept into his chest. Something felt off. He was about to knock, but then his gaze shifted to the small sliver of the room visible through the crack in the door.

And what he saw made his breath catch in his throat.

A woman, dressed in a sleek, form-fitting outfit that bordered on provocative, was standing intimately close to Zhan. Her shining manicured hands were snaked around his neck, her body pressed against him as if they were locked in a private moment. Zhan's arm was loosely draped around her waist, his posture unusually relaxed, a curving smile adored his lips. Her laughter was soft and flirtatious, and she swayed slightly, as if the whole world existed solely for her and Zhan.

For a moment, he couldn't move, couldn't breathe. The sight before him felt surreal, like he had walked into someone else's life, someone else's nightmare. His mind tried to rationalize what he was seeing, but the shock was too overwhelming.

Who was this woman? What was she doing in Zhan's arms?....no in his husband's arms? Was this the reason, his husband didn't need him anymore?

...To Be Continued