In Between Us || Zhanyi

Zhan stepped inside the dimly lit room, his gaze finding Yibo lying still, fragile, his body betraying the strength he once held. A quiet breath left Zhan's lips as he approached, his fingers brushing the blanket to adjust it over Yibo's shoulders before he sat beside him, pulling the low stool closer.

His hand found Yibo's—not too cold, but limp in his grasp. Zhan rubbed it gently between his palms, as if his touch alone could bring Yibo back, could undo the damage he had caused. His voice, when it finally came, was low and rough.

"You're so quiet... But I suppose that's my fault, isn't it?"

A humorless chuckle escaped him, but it faded just as quickly. His thumb traced slow circles over Yibo's knuckles, his grip tightening slightly.

"All my life, I've told people to stand their ground, to never surrender themselves for someone else's sake. I've built my entire career empowering others, making sure no one bends under pressure, strengthen their backbone. And yet, you..."

He swallowed hard, blinking against the burn in his eyes

"You, of all people. You, my own husband suffered just in front of me, and I was so blind to even acknowledge it. Again, and again. For me. For this... whatever this is between us...you suffered. I always wanted to be the one who protects you... the one who makes sure you are safe, strong, untouchable. I wanted you to feel secure and free. But look at you now. Look at what I've done."

"Why?" His voice dropped to a whisper. "Why you have to be like this?"

His breath shuddered as he lowered his head, pressing his forehead against their joined hands.

"I don't deserve such devotion, Yibo nor anyone in this world do. I even don't deserve you. And I refuse to let you lose yourself for me. No matter what it takes, I will make sure you never have to suffer because of me or anyone again – Even if, in the end, you don't choose me by your side."

The words sat heavy in the a sudden thought struck Zhan like a blade to the chest.

◈◉◈◉◈◉◈◉◈

The room was silent except for the faint sound of Yibo's breathing. Zhan sat beside him, fingers barely touching Yibo's wrist, as if grounding himself.

He just promised he would empower Yibo. He had meant it.

'Even if Yibo doesn't choose me, I'll be okay?'

The words had left his mouth so easily, spoken like an undeniable truth. A declaration of selflessness.

Yet now, in the stillness of the night, something inside him twisted violently against that idea.

If that was true, then why did it hurt?

Why did every part of him scream in defiance, a dark, possessive voice curling in his chest—one he had never known existed?

No. Yibo can't leave, HE is MINE.

Zhan shut his eyes. He wasn't supposed to think this way. He was a professor, a man of discipline and principle. He had spent his life believing in equality, in choice, in independence, a man who had spent years making decisions with logic rather than impulse.

Then why—

Why did every part of him reject the idea of Yibo walking away?

It couldn't be just duty. Simple sense of responsibility. It wasn't just a conjugal loyalty. Limited to the tag of marriage. He was also sure that he never treated Yibo as his mere possession like an object.