In Between Us || Zhanyi

Breaking Points

Ziyi waited patiently. 

"He thought I needed him in a way I can't even describe," Zhan continued, his tone carrying disbelief. "He offered himself, Ziyi. Like... he thought that's what I wanted from him, that it was the only thing he had to give me."...Zhan closed his eyes, feeling his nerves pulled up

Ziyi's expression shifted from curiosity to something more serious. "He offered himself? umm~~ How??"

"He...He stripped off his shirt".........Zhan chocked his words...."in that way...he kneeled...ask for punishment......*exhale*.....as if, as if......".................Zhan didn't find words to complete

"It is fine Xiao, don't push yourself"........The weight of his helplessness hung in the air between them. Ziyi could sense how much the situation had shaken him.

"I didn't know what to do, what to say.....I helped him put his shirt back on and left. But I couldn't stop thinking... how did we get here? Why does he think that's what I want? What's even worse is... a feeling creeping inside me that saying It was all mind fault. I am the reason where we are standing but again there was a thought that he doesn't understand me even a bit".....his voice tightening as the memory replayed in his mind.

Ziyi's gaze turned sharper, more serious. She leaned forward slightly, her tone shifting into something firmer....."Will you be comfortable to share some of your daily life, how your dynamics goes also what exactly happened today?"

Zhan nodded, explaining Ziyi in sequence as much as possible, Ziyi taking out her ipad, started taking notes, making draft......soon the air turned into professional discussion

"So, when you shifted in your apartment and you already had househelpers?".........Ziyi asked in between Zhan's explanation

"Yes, I used to have only one, but I noticed the househelper was making him uncomfortable, so I gave him full access and allowed him to do whatever he thinks right."

"And he dismissed the maid and took up everything on him"

Zhan nodded....."I thought that is how wanted things so didn't interfere further"

Zhan sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I know, it's not more than a miscommunication. But trust me Ziyi, I tried. I really tried but it feels like we're completely out of sync. I say one thing, he hears another. I express how I feel, and it's like he's on a different wavelength. How are we supposed to fix this if we can't even have a conversation without it spiraling into something like... today? And added to all his silence.......it feels so dead of myself"

Ziyi nodded thoughtfully, she removed her glasses and gave Zhan a thoughtful look then spoke steady and firm......." Have you thought about 'Divorce'?"

The word hit Zhan like a punch. Divorce. He hadn't even allowed himself to think that far. "Divorce?" he repeated, disbelief in his voice. "No".....Zhan answered firmly