Pretty Like Poetry | TAEJUN

Yeonjun, student: You're smart, right?

Yeonjun had been thinking of ways to improve his grades and, perhaps, his standing with Taehyun. The idea of getting help from him wasn't just about schoolwork; it was an opportunity to build a bridge when Taehyun seemed so determined to stay on safe land. Last year, Taehyun had tutored people for some extra cash, and while he hadn't picked it up again this year, maybe he'd be willing to make an exception for a student in need.

Yeonjun could almost hear Taehyun's sarcastic voice in his head.

Taehyun: Jeez, I don't know. Lemme get back to you on that one. 

The thought made him smirk as he sent a quick message.

Yeonjun, student: I'm joking, I'm joking! Sorry if I offended you... Anyway, could you help me out?

Taehyun: Help you? With what?

Yeonjun, student: Grades. My parents aren't thrilled.

Taehyun: Damn. How bad are we talking?

Yeonjun, student: Their reaction or my grades?

Taehyun: Both.

Yeonjun, student: They're ready to execute me over a B...

Taehyun, student: A 'B'?! OMG, that's terrible!

Yeonjun could practically hear the exaggerated gasp, and he rolled his eyes, smiling.

Yeonjun, student: Very funny. B's aren't even bad.

Taehyun: Nah, it's great for me. Now I don't have to worry about you being smarter than me.

Yeonjun, student: Hilarious.

He couldn't help but grin as he typed the next message.

Yeonjun, student: So, what do you say? Willing to help me out?

Taehyun: I don't tutor anymore.

Yeonjun, student: I'll make it worth your time. How about twenty bucks an hour?

Taehyun: Sounds like your pockets are full, so yeah, I graciously accept.

Yeonjun, student: Gold digger!

Taehyun: You're the one offering.

Yeonjun, student: Fine. Tomorrow after school?

Taehyun: Should be fine.

Yeonjun, student: Cool, what class do you have last?

Taehyun: History.

Yeonjun, student: Ouch.

Taehyun: Tell me about it. Mr. Anderson is brutal.

The two continued their conversation until Taehyun mentioned he was heading to bed. Yeonjun messaged a quick "night," though Taehyun didn't reply, probably already asleep.

Yeonjun, on the other hand, couldn't sleep. The quiet and darkness stirred his thoughts, making everything feel more intense. Restless, he switched on his nightlight, grabbed a tablet to swallow down with his glass of water, and rummaged through his drawer until he found it.

He perched on the narrow ledge of his window, just wide enough to cradle him as he settled in, feeling the crisp night air brush against his face. With his notebook in hand and the joint between his fingers, he flicked on his lighter and let it catch flame, inhaling deeply. 

On an exhale, he pulled the joint away and behind writing down his thoughts. The quiet let his thoughts unravel, his hand gliding across the page as he jotted down ideas. Each word he'd etched in the past had left an imprint on the pages beneath, like a ghost of things unsaid. For him, those faint impressions felt like a reminder of everything he kept to himself.

His eyes drifted to a faint scar on his left thumb as he turned the page, taking another long drag. Outside, the moon hung high, its light bright and almost accusing, like he was sitting under an interrogation lamp. A bat flitted across his view, quick as if it were chasing—or being chased by—something unseen.

Yeonjun found himself relating. However, his chase was against time and he wasn't sure which would prevail. Would he manage to escape the blackmail being used against him or is the passing time simply holding out the inevitable. He had risked everything for this secret, clinging to the hope that it wouldn't surface and destroy not only him but also the people he cared about.

When he finished his sin of green, he let out a final puff, watching the smoke twist up into the dark as he flicked the stub out the window, leaving it all behind for the night.

Pulling the window closed, he slumped against the wall, letting the silence of his room itch at his skin. He brought his hands to his arms and comforted them, wishing his haze was strong enough to ignore the loneliness surrounding him.

Instead, his eyes eventually grew heavy, the weight of secrets and the night settling in. Finally, he let himself fall into bed, hoping his numbed mind and sleep might offer a few hours of escape.

***

The next morning, his mother woke him early, suggesting for him to get in an early study before he even got out of bed. He wanted to tell her that the brain wasn't even fully awake until 10 a.m., but he held his tongue.

Still half-asleep, he pulled himself out of bed, letting the blanket fall as his mother left the room. Downstairs, he made himself some toast and water, though he barely touched either, opting to head back upstairs under the guise of studying.

By the time his father peeked in to check on him, he was holding his notebook open, pen poised in hand.

Yeonjun shot his father a practiced smile, forcing his lips up just enough to pass inspection. It was an act—like the scattered notes in front of him, a mask of diligence barely hiding the exhaustion and the distraction that buzzed just under his skin. He hadn't done nearly as much revision as it seemed, spending more time scrolling through his phone, his ears constantly tuned for footsteps.

Classes dragged on as if time itself had slowed down. He was already tired, his thoughts drifting as he yawned, waiting outside Taehyun's last class. Students passing by gave him curious looks, the sight of Yeonjun hanging around for someone a potential topic for gossip.

When Taehyun finally came out, he was deep in conversation with the teacher, one of the last students to leave. The onlookers only made Yeonjun frown, reminded of the reason people assumed the worst of him. He quickly looked away, but Taehyun caught his eye, walking over briskly.

"I need to hit my locker first," Taehyun muttered, shoving a stubborn textbook into his bag with an annoyed huff. Yeonjun nodded, trailing behind him. Out of the corner of his eye, Yeonjun noticed a few classmates shooting glances his way, whispers starting up as they noticed him loitering behind Taehyun. He sped up to meet the younger, forcing himself to ignore it.

"You walk like you're paranoid," Yeonjun commented, watching as Taehyun's fingers flew over the lock, twisting the dial with practiced speed. For a split second, Taehyun paused, eyebrows lifting as if the comment raised questions.

Taehyun looked at him, brow furrowed. "What?"

"Seriously. You're always walking super fast, like you're trying to outrun something," Yeonjun continued, amusement coloring his tone. "Minus the constant looking over your shoulder."

"Walking fast just gets you where you're going quicker," Taehyun shrugged, shaking his head. "And, yeah, I've heard that before."

"Fair enough. So, library?"

"Actually, my place," Yeonjun said. "Dining room. That way, if my parents see me studying, they'll know I'm trying."

Taehyun simply nodded, zipping his bag and heading down the hallway without further comment. Yeonjun fell into step beside him, bracing himself for what he hoped would be the start of a shift—one he hadn't quite figured out how to make but felt was worth the try.