Hogwarts Adventures: Finding my place

                                        January 2012

My vision is blurred. It's getting harder to breathe... no, no, no. This can't happen. Take deep breaths. Breathe Belle, breathe.

Then when I see it. The green light casted right at her. No! Everything starts closing in. I drop down to my knees, screaming and crying. My lungs feel like they might explode. Not her. Why her?

I can barely reach her before he gets to her before me. "Tina," he screams....look out! Before those words left my mouth, the green light from the tip of the wand hits him straight on the chest.
Why him? Why is any of this happening!

I can't give up, not now. I need to fight this. Come on, Belle, you are way stronger than you think.

I raise my wand, pointing it right at the masked figure. "Avada Kedava," those words hang in the air, but they never left my mouth.

The greenlight is coming straight towards me... yet I stand there unmoving, embracing it full on. One...two...three... hit right in the chest, the world around me goes numb...

"Miss Scamander....Belle...Belle." a hand tapping my shoulder brings me back to reality.

"She is ready to see you now"

"Huh?"

"The minster of Magic is ready to see you now,"

Right, of course.

"Right this way," she gestures for me to follow. Her heels clicking on the only sound echoing through the corridors of the British ministry of magic.

We stop in front of the door that reads

Mrs Leta Lestrange-Scamander

I take a deep breath. Putting my walls of occlumency back up. Before entering the room.

I take in the surroundings of the room. It's a standard ministry office. A huge round table with a few people sitting around the table... a few I recognize from MACUSA.

"Please take a seat, Miss Scamander." Leta's voice interrupts my observations.

I feel their eyes on me as I move to take a seat, wiping my sweaty palms on the side of my jeans.

My occlumency walls are so high up. I refuse to show them even a crack in it.

"I have read your report, Miss Scamander...I am sorry to hear about your parents." The first one speaks. I didn't even bother to check the name of who I am talking to. They are all useless anyway.

"Thanks," remember, not even a slight crack in your occlumency walls.

They all share a look before the next one continues.

"There's something that you have mentioned in your report that stood out to us ..."

Ah, there it is. The Million Galleon question.

"You have mentioned in your report that you have been hit with the killing curse, and yet it didn't affect you?"

"That's correct, yes," I say, refusing to make any eye contact.

They all share the same look again... confusion etched on their faces.

"And you are certain?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure you wasn't imagining it?"

I shake my head.

"Could you have maybe been lucid and probably imagined it?"

"Or maybe, seeing the death of your parents that took place right in front of you traumatized you, so you mixed up the curses?"

I shake my head again. Deep breaths, Belle. Deep breaths.

I reach for the bottle of water on the table. feeling the cool liquid go down my throat.

"This doesn't make any sense. How could you have been hit with the killing curse and have survived?"

I stay silent. Not because I don't want to answer. But because I don't know the answer to that question.

I feel their frustrations give way. I can practically see the wheels turning in their brains, trying to come up with the most reasonable explanation...

After a few minutes of silence

"Miss Scamander, are you certain you have been hit with the killing curse?"

I take a deep breath. Slightly feeling my frustrations rising with their questions.

"Yes, I am certain,"

Leta senses that and decides that it would be a good time to end today's session.

"We will keep in touch, Miss Scamander."

They all stand up to leave the room.

I let out a sigh of relief, thankful for the end of their interrogation.

Leta is still sitting opposite me.

I grab my water bottle and was just about to get out of my seat to leave when she finally speaks.

"Belle, are you okay?"

Am I okay? Merlin, that's a dumb question.

"Just peachy, Leta."

She sighs and looks at me. " Look, Belle, we are family -"

"Yes Leta, I am aware you married my uncle, which makes us family... what's your point?"

My tone was a bit harsher than I intended it to be. I can see the look of contemplation in her eyes.

"Yes, I married your uncle, but I was also a good friend of your fathers..." She pauses for a minute. Taking my shaky hands in hers.

"You have witnessed something traumatic, Belle. You watched your parents die in front of you. You got a killing curse casted at you and somehow survived. You watched a lot of people die, Belle. All I am saying is that it would do you some good to speak to mind healer about this... you can't use occlumency to deal with something like this. It's not healthy. "

She slips me a business card that reads:

Milicent Cambridge - mind healer

"Just think about what I said." she squeezes my hand a little before leaving me with my thoughts.