Nightmares Of Ecstacy | 18+

P A R T  one

✾

“Fuck men. I’m done. Completely, officially, done. I don’t need them, I don’t want them. Never again. Not worth the energy.”

I slumped back in my barstool, crossing my arms like a petulant child. The frustration bubbling in my chest wasn’t just emotional anymore, it was physical, visceral.

Tonight had been the final straw.

“Quinn, will you calm the hell down and tell me what’s got you ranting like this?” my best friend, Lena, muttered, barely glancing up from her cocktail as she swirled the liquid lazily in her glass. The little smirk tugging at her lips only added to my irritation.

God, she’s such a bitch.

A lovely, enabling bitch, but a bitch nonetheless.

“I’m angry, Lena,” I said, throwing my hands in the air. “I dressed up! Like, full effort, okay? I shaved everywhere, even waxed because shaving wasn’t enough. I bought this ridiculously expensive lace set from Victoria’s Secret...you know, the one I showed you? The one that cost me half my paycheck? I even moisturized. Moisturized, Lena. Every damn inch of me smelled like coconut dreams and baby angels. All for this guy, because I thought, he might actually be worth it. But no. Guess what?”

“What?” she asked, biting back a laugh.

“It was a disaster. A dry disaster. Like, Sahara Desert levels of dry.”

Lena raised a brow, finally looking intrigued. “Dry? You mean—”

“Yes. Dry. As in, he couldn’t kiss to save his life. Like, I gave him a chance, I really did but there was nothing there. No spark, no heat. I don’t know if it was his weird tongue movements or his...ugh, I don’t even want to relive it. The whole thing was just...tragic. And then he had the audacity to think we were still going to sleep together?!”

I shook my head, taking a large gulp of my drink.

“So, you didn’t?” Lena asked, leaning her chin on her hand, eyes glinting with amusement.

“Absolutely not,” I snapped. “I went home, took a shower, and decided I’m done. If men can’t even put in the effort to make me feel something before we even get to the good stuff, then what’s the point? I can buy my own vibrator, thank you very much.”

Lena snorted into her drink, nearly choking as she tried to stifle a laugh. “You’re so dramatic.”

“Dramatic or honest?” I shot back. “Maybe if men actually knew how to make a woman feel wanted, I wouldn’t be here, ranting to you like a lunatic. But nope, I’m cursed with bad luck and mediocre men.”

“Or maybe you’re just picking the wrong ones,” Lena said with a shrug, taking another sip of her cocktail.

I glared at her. “Don’t victim blame me right now, Lena.”

“Fine, fine,” she said, holding up her hands. “But honestly, Quinn, if you’ve got all that frustration pent up, maybe you just need to find someone who knows what the hell they’re doing.”

Easier said than done, I thought bitterly, draining the rest of my drink in one long swallow.

“Men who actually know what they’re doing...like really know their shit, the kind who can make a woman cum and not just pretend they know how...don’t exist, Lena. They’re a myth. Probably some bullshit fairytale made up by a desperate woman like me to keep hope alive.”

Lena raised an eyebrow but stayed quiet, letting me spiral.

“I mean, seriously. I’ve been cursed, Lena. Cursed with bad sex and men who think foreplay is just an optional warm up. And don’t even get me started on the size issue. Small dicks? They haunt me. I swear, every single guy I’ve been with, it’s like the universe is trying to punish me.”