Texting Anonymous

I sit there in my car for a moment, staring at the steering wheel, trying to get a grip on myself. The school day had been brutal. Everywhere I went, I heard snickers, whispers. The looks people gave me, the way they talked behind my back... it all felt like it was suffocating me. I should've known better than to fall asleep with my phone out, but now I was paying the price for it. Everyone had seen it. The picture. The one thing I never wanted anyone to see. It wasn't just a mistake, it felt like a disaster.

I can't help but replay the events in my head. The laughter. The whispers. It was everywhere. How could I have been so stupid?

I stare out at the house in front of me. The familiar sight that used to bring me comfort, now just feels like a trap. My heart races, my stomach churning as I think about what awaits me inside. I can't face my mom, not with everything that's happened. Not with her disappointment in me.

I sit there a little longer, hands shaking, trying to calm myself, but it's useless.

Finally, I open the door and step out. The walk to the front door feels like it takes forever. Each step feels heavier than the last, the weight of all those eyes on me, of the judgment, of my own stupid mistakes pressing down on me.

I walk inside and barely glance at my mom, who's sitting in the living room, probably waiting for me to come in.

"How was school, Stan?" she asks, her voice almost too calm.

I don't respond. I can't. Instead, I turn and make my way upstairs, my feet dragging, my heart pounding.

As soon as I reach my room, I slam the door behind me and lock it. The click of the lock is the only sound I hear, but it does nothing to stop the thoughts racing through my mind.

I slide down to the floor next to the door, my back against it. My phone is still in my pocket, and I know I'm going to check it again, even though I don't want to. I know I'll see the comments, the memes, the people who took it too far. But I can't stop myself.

What have I done?

I close my eyes, willing the thoughts to stop, but it's like they're on a loop. Over and over again, all the things I tried to avoid, the things I wanted to keep hidden.

And now, it's all out in the open.

My mom knocks gently on the door, her voice coming through in that soft, yet worried tone, "Stanley? What's wrong?"

I stay quiet, pressing my back further against the door. My heart is pounding in my chest. I want to say something, I want to explain, but I can't. Not to her. Not after everything that's happened. Not after everything they saw.

I feel the weight of the silence between us, heavy and suffocating. Her knocking is gentle, almost like she's trying to reach me, but I don't know how to respond. She waits for a moment, as if expecting an answer. I'm sure she thinks I'm just being quiet because of the normal teenage stuff, but this is different. I can't bring myself to face her right now. Not after this.

I hear her sigh, and then the sound of her footsteps retreating down the hall. The door stays locked. I don't even know if she's giving me space or if she's just given up.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, but I ignore it. I don't want to deal with anyone else right now. Not my friends, not her, not even him.

I stay still, sitting against the door, feeling the weight of everything pressing in. It feels like the walls are closing in on me. What now?

I pull my phone out of my pocket, staring at it for a moment before unlocking the screen. My heart sinks a little as I see the flood of notifications. People's names flashing across my screen, some of them I don't even want to see right now.