Endless

Ava Jax Azer 



one two three four,  my body begins to move in time with the music in my head. I hum a tune as my body moves. I move across the floor, leaping and spinning and going on one leg while my other flies into the air. my arms and legs move with emotion, all my anger, sadness and hurt shows not only in my face but in my body as I move to the tune in my head.  with a flick of my toes and a single movement in my other leg I go spinning. the toes of my wooden point shoes hit the wood floors as I spin across my dance room. my arms move in and out and I spot the same painting on a wall so I don't get dizzy. I finish my turns with a single Fouette and then I end with my right leg behind my left, my toes touch the ground like a feather falling  and my arms are held high in the air. 

I can feel someone watching me so I look in the mirrors in front of me. his emerald eyes watch me as I stare back at him. "you're getting a lot better at that," uncle Kitt says. his arms are crossed and he is leaning against the stone wall of my ballet room, he is wearing a pair of black pants and a simple white shirt. I finally turn to look at him and he finishes his sentence. "you are getting better at showing your emotions through your body and not only your face, I'm proud." 

"um thank you," I say quietly and he nods. he watches me as I walk over to my bag and I sit down so I can take my point shoes off. the silk laces come undone around my ankle and my shoe soon slips off to reveal my bruised and blistered toes from the weeks where I have been dancing more than usual. "when did you arrive?" I ask. 

"about an hour ago," Kitt says, he is still watching me like he doesn't believe what he is seeing. It's been a while since I have talked to my uncle or my aunt; the last few times that they have come to visit I have locked myself in my room and I have refused to see anyone. the only people who have had real conversations with me these past two and a half years are my parents, my brother and sister and Rowan. with everyone else I keep my conversations short and emotionless. "you have changed." he says. 

"yes well everyone changes," I say simply, my feet ache as I slip on socks and I pull on my shoes. 

"why have you been avoiding me when I come to visit?" Kitt asks and I can hear the hurt in his voice. the hurt in his voice makes me want to cry because I have hated avoiding him, I truly hated it. he is my uncle and I love him dearly but I just couldn't face him. we were very close when I was a child, I was close with both of my uncles but now I just don't know how to talk to them anymore. 

"I wasn't avoiding you," I say, numbing my emotions like I'm so used to doing.  "I was busy." 

"you were busy the entire time I was here 2 months ago?" he raises an eyebrow. he was here for 3 weeks a few months ago and it was very hard to avoid him, I don't know how I managed it. 

"yeah I was," I stand up and move to leave but Kitt moves in front of the door, his arms still crossed. "move please."

"talk to me first and maybe I will move," he says. 

"we were talking," I reply and I try to go around him but he moves to the side and blocks me fully from leaving. 

"new deal," he starts, "talk to me for more than 3 seconds and then I will move." 

"there is nothing for us to talk about," I say. 

"Ava," he sighs out a long breath. "please just talk to me, I'm worried about you. you haven't been answering my letters and you avoid me every time I come to visit, and from what your father has told me, you are avoiding a lot of people and you are only talking to your closest family and friend."