someone to call mine (pjo various x reader)

okay, so walking into a cursed recording studio with a satyr, a know-it-all, and a dude with a sword in his pocket wasn't exactly how i thought my day would go—but hey, i got isekai'd into a greek mythology nightmare, so here we are.

the place smelled like mildew and lost dreams. grover was already sweating. percy looked like he was ready to punch a wall. and annabeth? totally calm. i, on the other hand, was mentally reciting the plot like it was a quiz i couldn't afford to fail. because technically, i had read this chapter before.

sitting behind the desk was a man who looked like he moonlighted as a vampire lounge singer.

"charon," i muttered under my breath. "the one and only."

he looked us up and down like we were something he found on the bottom of his shoe. "you want in, you pay."

percy, being the genius he is, slapped a few drachmas on the counter like he was tipping a barista.

charon blinked at the coins. "what is this, a joke?"

percy looked confused. "uh, money?"

"you're trying to bribe me with pocket change," charon deadpanned. "do i look like the tooth fairy?"

i sighed dramatically and elbowed percy. "give him the rest. trust me. he's a sucker for flattery and underappreciated employee vibes."

percy reluctantly handed over a whole bag of coins. "i'll put in a good word with hades. maybe get you a raise or... dental?"

charon's eyes lit up like it was christmas. "finally, someone gets it." he waved us through like we were VIPs.

we were heading for the metal detectors—because nothing says "gateway to the underworld" like airport security—when the real problem showed up.

cerberus. big, drooling, triple-headed security dog. he was cute in a "can and will eat you" sort of way.

percy tried to distract him with a bedpost from crusty's mattress shop. "hey, boy! look! a stick!"

cerberus looked at the stick. then at percy. then back at the stick. he looked offended. like, how dare you.

annabeth rolled her eyes, stepped forward, and pulled out a bright red rubber ball like she was on an episode of dog whisperer: olympian edition.

"sit," she commanded.

cerberus sat. all three heads. synchronized like an olympic team.

"go, go, go!" annabeth hissed.

percy, grover, and i booked it past the giant dog. i may or may not have screamed a little when cerberus licked the back of my shirt. that is not a sensation i ever want to relive.

annabeth chucked the ball, and cerberus bounded after it like a happy murder puppy. she caught up just as the metal detectors lost their minds.

alarms blaring. lights flashing. somewhere in the distance, a security guard shouted, "they've got magic! get 'em!"

i turned to grover, panting. "i swear, if we die because percy brought a bedpost to a dog fight, i'm haunting someone."

"probably me," grover muttered, already wheezing.

"absolutely you."

and then we ran like our lives depended on it—because, y'know, they totally did.

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the path to the house of hades was long, miserable, and smelled like someone microwaved despair. grover was still rocking those cursed flying shoes—which, in hindsight, was mistake #1.