In The End-The Hobbit

I sit at the table and watch amused as all the dwarves go into Bilbo's pantry and set it on the three tables that have been pushed together. At first, I was feeling angry for Bilbo as his house got turned inside out but after realising that this was part of Gandalf's plan and remembering that he did inform me this would happen, I began to loosen up and watch the dwarves in their state of reunion and hunger. Gandalf smiles in my direction when he notices me chuckling to myself. Although I have never truly liked dwarves, I can't help but find this particular group amusing. I laugh at Bilbo as he tries to get one of the Dwarves to put a chair back.

"So, Gandalf, what are all their names?" I ask looking around bewildered as Gandalf sits next to me.

Gandalf begins to point out the dwarves as he says their names "That's Fili and Kili. There's Dori, Nori, Ori, Gloin and Oin. Those guys over there are Bifur, Bofur and Bombur. And you've already met Dwalin and Balin."

I nod to myself as Gandalf points them out trying to take mental note of something unique of each of them, so I can remember. As soon as the dwarves are seated and eating, everything turns to chaos. I sit next to Gandalf and pass along a bowl of tomatoes to Gloin. Fili stands on the table walking along passing drinks out to the dwarves. I lightly jump in my seat as I try to avoid some broth landing on me as it spills out a cup Fili holds. I look out the door and see Bilbo's back, he's strangely still. I can tell he's about to go into a state of crazy.

Gandalf stands and walks out of the room as some of the dwarves begin to take stuff into the kitchen and the pantry "So why would an Elf maiden be in The Shire?" I hear a soft voice ask. I turn to see Balin seated next to me, puffing on a pipe.

"I am no elf maiden" I simply say in a strong tone. I haven't been called that in a long time and I don't like addressing my eleven side in any term. I know it's there and it's a part of me, but I'd rather not accept its existence. Besides, I don't think the dwarves would take lightly to knowing I have elf within my blood, so I'll do what I always have. Lie.

"Oh. I am sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I thought you were an Elf because of your bow and arrows at the front door" Balin explains himself "they are very similar to the elvish bows. In fact, it seems to look like an ancient elvish bow from thousands of generations ago."

This dwarf knows his history, I'll give him that. Taking in a breath and sitting pokerfaced, I look at him like he's crazy "Well, I bought that bow from an old man near Mirkwood. It could have come from anywhere before that" I say trying to not make it seem too suspicious as I take a sip of my tea. Balin gives a small nod, taking the information as nothing of interest.

I turn around as some of the dwarves at the table begin to make a tune with the knives and forks. Bilbo comes running in saying "Please don't do that! You'll blunt them!"

"Did you hear that lads? He says we'll blunt the knives!" Bofur says in a cheerful tone. Before I know what's happened, plates and bowls are going flying everywhere and the dwarves begin to sing.

Blunt the knives and bend the forks!

Smash the bottles and burn the corks!

Chip the glasses and crack the plates!

That's what Bilbo Baggins hates

Cut the cloth and trail the fat!

Leave the bones on the bedroom mat!

Pour the milk on the pantry floor!

Splash the wine on every door!

Dump the crocks in a boiling bowl;

Pound them up with a thumping pole;

And when you've finished, if they are whole,

Send them down the hall to roll!