Stuck In The Middle

a/n Long chapter, you're welcome m9

(Y/N) - Your Name

(Y/H/C) - Your Hair Colour

TRIGGER WARNING - SEXUAL ABUSE AND SELF HARMING

(Y/N) POV

Once we entered Dan and Phil's hotel room, we played a round of Mario Kart. I beat Dan and his face was priceless. It was funny as. He just got beat by me, I did warn him. "Right, I'm going to go to the toilet." I told them. "When you get back I want a rematch!" Dan told me and I gave him a thumbs up.

Once I entered the bathroom, I heard my phone goes off. "CAN YOU ANSWER IT PLEASE, PLACE IT ON SPEAKER IF YOU LIKE!" I shouted to Dan and Phil. I heard shuffling from the room and the sound of ringing stopped. It was silent for a moment before someone spoke up.

"R-Right you slutbag, y-you can't e-escape from me. Y-You need to c-come back to m-me, I'm i-in a horny s-state right now a-and if you're not h-here I'll give you more b-beatings than before. I'm c-coming to find you n-no matter what!" I heard the phone call end. 

Memories started flooding in from the past.

*TW*

~FLASHBACK~

I was a my old apartment in Conventy, just on my laptop and I was in a bad mood, due to dealing with my potenial friends. I heard a loud knock coming from my front door. I made my way there, fiddling with my (Y/H/C) hair in fustration. I opened the door and saw my drunk boyfriend. I sighed , "You need to stop drinking so much." I told him and his expression changed to anger.

"You can't tell me what to do!" He yelled, slapping my face and pushing me onto the floor. I placed my hand against my cheek, wincing when I touched it, feeling a tear fall down my face. I flick my hair out of my face and see him making his way towards me. He straddled me and started kissing my neck. I tried with all my might to get off him, but he tightened his grip.

"Get off me!" I shouted into his ear, making him move, but resulted in my getting punched in the eye. I cried in pain and kicked him in the balls. Once he moved off me, I got up off the floor. As I was about to run off, he grabbed my leg and pulled it, making me fall face first onto the carpet floor. I looked down at the carpet and saw a few blood stains. I felt blood run down my nose and my lips, making me taste the metallic substance. 

I tried to get my leg out of his grasp, but he pulled me towards him, making me develop carpet burn. He flipped me over and straddled me, placing his lips on my neck again, leaving love bites. He started pulling the hems of shirt. He pulled it up and I refused to take it off. Instead of forcing me to take it off, he physically ripped it off my body.

He grabbed my right boob and started to fondle with it, whilst trailing kissed down my collar bone, down my arm then down to my hip. He removed his hand from my breast and started unbuttoning my white ripped skinny jeans. I pushed myself away from, which resulted in me getting punched in the stomach. That was going to leave a big bruise. I placed my hands on my stomach and winced in pain.

I felt my jeans and underwear go down and the sound of a zipper. I felt multiple tears stream down my face. "YOU NEED TO DO EVERYTHING THAT I TELL YOU TO DO OKAY?!" He yelled at me, placing his hand behind my neck, drawing my face closed to his. "OKAY?!" He said angrily, and I nodded. He roughly kissed me, forcing his tongue down my throat, whilst he inserted himself into me. 

~END OF FLASHBACK~

*TW HAS FINISHED*

I pushed multiple stuff of the counter top and looked at myself in the mirror. Mascara left streaks down my cheeks. I looked around for something sharp, anything to help me find realise. I opened the cupboards under the sink and found a disposable razor. I broke the razor by placing something heavy on it and cut my wrists over the faded ones. 

I dropped the razor in the sink and placed my hands on the side of the sink. I tried to breathe in and out but I was struggling. I let out a loud sob from my mouth and placed my arms around my figure. My back pressed against the wall behind me and I slid down. Multiple sobs escaped my mouth. I brought my knees towards my chest and placed my head upon my knees. 

His voice was in my head, the actions he did to me were planted in my head, they wouldn't go away. I heard a knock on the bathroom door and 2 concerned voices. "(Y/N) you okay?" I heard Phil say. "Of course she's not okay Phil, there was a loud noise and she's crying loudly. Asking her if she's okay--" 

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD!!" I screamed, placing my hands over my ears, trying to block out his voice, but I knew that it was pointless, it was all in my head. The voices got louder and my screams got even louder. I closed my eyes, shaking my head, trying to get the thoughts out but nothing seems to be working.

My cries also got louder. I felt 2 pairs of arms wrap around me and I tried to get out of it. Once I did, I stood up and turned to see Dan and Phil with a scared expression. "Get the fuck off me!" I shouted, keeping my arms around my body. Tears blurred my vision, "I've had enough of your abuse!" I shouted. My back pressed against the counter top and I fell to the ground. 

I placed my hands on my face, sheilding my eyes. "(Y/N) listen, he's not here, it's me Dan, Phil's here too. Your stuck in your thoughts. You need to snap out of them. Just listen to my voice okay..." Dan said, but I didn't respond. "(Y/N) it's Phil, fill you mind with happy thoughts. Think about the time when you beat Dan at Mario Kart a couple minutes ago, remember his espression on his face when you beat him." He told me and my breathing slowed down a bit. 

"It's working." I heard Phil say to Dan. "Remember earlier today when myself and Phil came to your meet and greet on our knees just to invite you to lunch." Dan said and I laughed a bit. The memories were going slightly, my tears stopped falling. "Remember all the fun memories you have had with Zoe, Alfie and Joe." Phil said and I looked up at them both. Their expressions were worried. "I--I--" Dan and Phil engulfed me into a hug. 

"It's okay." I heard Phil cooed in my ear. I departed the group hug and I felt a pain surge through my arms. Dan and Phil looked at my arm and their eyes widened. "Dan call room service and ask them for a first aid kit." Phil told him and he nodded. Once he left the room, Phil helped me stand up and he grabbed the towel on the side, soaking it in water and dabbed my arm. I winced a coupe times, "Sorry." Phil told me, dabbing my arm gently. "It's fine." I whispered. I heard the door open and then closed. Dan walked in and handed the kit to Phil. 

After Dan and Phil sorted my arm out, we made our way back to the lounge area. "I'm sorry for scaring you both, it's just that phone call triggered a memory that mademe start doing this." I said, lifting my arm up slightly. "Are you okay? You did give us a fright." Phil asked me, looking at Dan then back to me, and I nodded. "A bit. Thank you. If I was in my own room, I don't know if Louise would of handled it, as she doesn't really like the sight of blood." I told them and they gave me a small smile. 

We decided to watch a movie as I couldn't play Mario Kart anymore. Dan still didn't admit to defeat so I'm guessing he still wants a rematch. Halfway through the film, I felt my eyes close and I fell a sleep. I felt a pair of arms pick me up bridal style, and I heard a door close. I heard knocking and the sound of Louise's voice. "Hey Dan, what you doing here so lat--" Louise was interupted by Dan, "(Y/N) fell asleep." Dan walked again and I felt myself being placed on a cold duvet cover. I heard them talking, but it turned into muffles as my dreams overtook me.