Stall Me (Break Me In)

Two months had passed and everything felt perfect. I got my truck back. I had three amazing friends who were all friends to each other, and we all seemed to get along exactly right. Brendon made friends with some kids in his music class, and he'd sometimes bring them to meet and hang out with us.

School was becoming more of a struggle for me. Anything that involves creative writing or opinionated writing was easy stuff for me, but the subjects involving math and actual memorization of formulas or facts about things that happened hundreds of years ago weren't my friends. Because of that, Brendon came over a lot more for homework and study sessions, except now, it was me asking him to come over. I don't know why I made a big deal about living slightly further away in my head. Brendon absolutely didn't mind at all, and sometimes he even brought someone else over.

Something I really liked was that Brendon branched off a bit and found other friends in his classes, and would choose to hang out with them instead of just the same group everyday. Not to say, I wanted him to go sometimes, but it was nice to know he didn't feel like he couldn't make friends with anyone else. Marisol and Rudy would sometimes go off and be by themselves, which I understood. They wanted alone time to be in love and make up for the awkwardness of the last two years.

Though, I was happy my friends were making more friends, I realized, I wasn't making friends anymore. If everyone went their own ways at lunch, I would go home until the forty-five minutes were up. I didn't try to get involved with anyone else. I was great at making friends, but sometimes I just wasn't motivated enough.

On that day, everyone went their separate ways, but I stayed on campus. It was an understatement to say I got no sleep the night before. It put me in an obvious mood. Wouldn't be good for me to be around anyone. I went to Mr. Kemp's classroom, which he kept open for students to come hang out during lunch, and I decided to work on my art book.

"Lisa," Mr. Kemp greeted me. "No lunch with your friends today?"

"Well, they're all hanging out with each other or everyone else. Didn't seem like I exactly fit in today," I shrugged. "Thought I'd come work."

"Why don't you fit in?" he asked. It took me a while start thinking of an answer because I was zoning out on the floor. But even when I started thinking, I couldn't come up with a real conclusion. After a few moments, he understood, and continued, "You know, it's easy to feel like you don't fit in when you purposely seclude yourself."

He knowingly left me speechless, and strode away to talk to some other students. I only worked for about ten minutes before my phone buzzed in my pocket.

Brendon: Hey what are you doing?

Me: Sitting in kemps. Whats going on?

I picked up my pencil again and continued sketching. I typically had a very heavy hand, but I was trying to press the pencil down as light as I could. I wasn't really sure what I was drawing. I just started making lines. I noticed another figure walk into the room.

"Mr. Urie," Kemp greeted him. I looked up. Brendon nodded to Mr. Kemp and continued walking towards me. I was sitting in the very back where my normal seat was. I expected him to sit across from me like usual, but this time he pulled the chair out next to me and placed himself in it.

"What's up?" I said, smiling, closing my book.

He shrugged, "Nothing. Why are you in here?" I shrugged. He stayed quiet for a few moments before he said, "Actually, I have something I need to talk to you about." He was nervous. What could he have to talk to me about that would make him uncomfortable? He didn't usually get this way with me.

I set my pencil down and turned my chair towards him. I clasped my hands together in my lap, and looked directly at him. "I am listening." He laughed, but was still wearing that same worrisome look on his beautiful face. He fidgeted slightly and his hands were kept busy either with each other or his clothes.