Light x Reader x L - Death Note

"No more enemies." He says and I stare past his shoulder as he whispers into my ear. "We work together." Is he serious? I push his chest lightly so I can see him looking at me. His eyes almost look like a stranger, I've never seen this crazed look on his face but his hand touching my face is not foreign to my skin. He's not thinking clearly, no way is he willing to be a killer's accomplice. 

"L, I don't think you understand the extent of what you're saying right now," I say looking at him shocked. I don't exactly know why I'm trying to make him back out but I fear if he doesn't now then he will later on. I don't need false hope. 

He crashes his lips into mine, pushing me into the wall harder. He kisses me roughly, being more dominant than ever before. I grip onto his clothes as he pushes his knee in between my legs. I go to hold onto him but he takes my wrists and holds them against the wall next to me. I kind of like this knew him, this only makes me question myself even more as I start to cry. He leans out of the kiss and looks at me. I close my eyes tightly and lean my head forward so he can't see me. 

"What? You don't want me or something?" I try to speak but the words don't come out right. I eventually sputter out the words. 

"Y-you don't want to be like me Lolly. P-please don't be l-like me." I crumple to the floor, he crouches in front of me, trying to push my hair out of my face. 

"What?" He says trying to get me to speak. I shake my head. 

"I killed them," I confess but of course it's not enough for him to understand. "My mum, my dad." I can feel L go very still. 

"What for?" He asks hesitantly. 

"I hated them. I hated them so much." I say crying but seethe with anger just thinking about them. "So as soon as I met Yama they were the first on my list." He doesn't know what to say and it's fare. "But before I even met Yama I had killed before." He still doesn't speak. "The kids at school. I shot them. I pulled the fire alarm and just aimed down the halls. One by one they all dropped to the ground. Teens with their unreachable big plans that bullied me, all gone and it was easy." I look up with tears running down my face. "You say you want to work with me but if you knew the truth then you really wouldn't." The words spill from my mouth. "I'm the person parent's warn their children about. The one they fear is under their bed. You really think I'm any different to a monster?" I say looking at his widened eyes. "Because I'm not, L. I'm not different and you know why? Because even these tears aren't remorse or me showing regret. I'm not sorry for what I did to my parents or those kids, nor the rest of the people I singled out." L stays crouched in front of me without a word. I could have just let him choose me and yet I pushed him away. And for what? "So I'm sorry for not being sorry. So L, you don't want me. The last thing you want is to have blood on your hands." I stand and see Yama is in the room. How much did he hear? 

"You're wrong." L says raising to my height. He pushes me to the wall. "I do want you and I don't care you're not sorry." I wonder how L would react to this conversation in a situation he hadn't met me.  Past him would be horrified at himself for discovering emotions and turning into a whole other side of himself. "Sure you've done some shit but now I want to be part of it. Partners." He doesn't even flinch. "You may feel like you're responsible for what I do and how I feel but I'm choosing this on my own." He raises my chin and looks into my eyes. "You can say as much as you want and push me away forever but I'm not giving up on you." He has this little smile on his lips as he says it. 

"I love you."

The words came out quiet but we are inches from each other's faces so he hears it clearly. His eyes widen as he looks at me. "(y/n)..." He says softly, taken back by my confession. I can't say anything more. What am I supposed to say after saying something like that?

"NO!" 

We both jolt in shock, I knock my head against the wall. We both turn and looks at Yama. In his hand is his Death Note. "We work together. We don't need him!" He yells. 

"Yama, calm down," I say and slowly stand up. 

"I ignored your foolish kindness to him but I had thought higher of you and hoped this was some kind of plan. I knew you were lying when you said it wasn't real but I'd hoped you'd come through in the end. Now you speak such mundane romantic words?! I forbid it." I scowl at him but my eyes widen when he opens the book. 

"What are you doing Yama?" I ask taking a step towards him. 

"What I should have done from the beginning. You said coming here would be fun. Playing happy families is not fun!" He yells, ready to write in his book. 

"It's not like that. L is just going to be on our side now. He's smart and loyal, this is good." I say taking another step. 

"Loyal? Every time he says he's on your side it falls through a day later. I'm not going to watch as he betrays you again." His eyes drift from me to the notebook, concentrating and he brings his hand up to write. 

"Yama NO!" I lunge at him.

A/N:

I am so sorry for not uploading anything recently. I've had no motivation to write as I have been feeling like crap recently and have had a lot of pressure on me, as well as some things going on. To be honest I don't know where this story is going in the long run so please please comment suggestions for what you want to happen or even just scenes between characters that don't even add much to the story. I feel like my writing is getting worse - opinions?