Unforeseen events

After spending some time wondering how I should start this without sounding desperate for love I decided on just going straight to the point. I'm in love with my best friend or at least I think I am. I've never been in "love" before or even had any sort of real crush that was on an actual person within 1,000 miles from me (Namjoon hit me up ;3). So this is all new to me and while I'm trying to sort out these feelings that are about to explode within me, I thought why not write down my loveless love story for others to read. At this point you might be wondering who is this stranger that is about to tell me their life story. \_(•-•)_/ For my own safety of not being outed by those who know me in real life.. let's say my name is Alex. Now that I have a 'secret identity' let me actually explain who I am. I'm a 16 year old girl in my junior year of high school, who is a bit shy at first but I open up after, I'm the definition of a introvert and not at all a people person but I am very friendly if I do say so myself. You'll better understand the kind of person I am as we go on. My unrequited "love" didn't just start a few weeks or days ago. It had actually started a year ago if a recall correctly. I know that this might seem like a insane amount of time to have theses feelings while not even knowing what these feelings mean. And frankly I can't believe it myself, the fact that l 'fell' for someone without even realizing it is so unreasonable to me. Look I know that I'm not the only one who has felt this way, but after reading countless blogs,articles and even quizzes like the ones buzzfeed has posted.. I realized that everyone's situation with unrequited love is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. You might be going "woooow, of course it'd be different you idiot" but listen, growing up all these movies were based off unrequited love stories. I'm looking at you Disney. And they all ended with a happy ending. The girl/guy finally has the courage to ask out their long life crush after going through some sort of makeover. The crush realizes they've had feeling towards them all along blah,blah,blah happy ending and then to the credits. This kinda programed me to believe that you could actually change how someone feels about you without brainwashing them at least. It might actually work if your crush is attractive to the your sex (f,m,o..) even if it's just by 1%. But in my case my crush is 100% straight (from what I've seen, I mean no one is completely straight) and this is like trying to climb the wall in Game of Thrones with just a spoon it's impossible, not even worth thinking about. But feelings can't just be forgotten or pushed over. They will only float back up and consistently try to convince you to climb the wall with that spoon with all you got. I know the phrase " Just push them down deep and they'll leave on their own" and I call bullsh***. My whole year last year was living,breathing and eating that belief and they just kept coming back stronger every time till I couldn't look the other way any more and had to face them

If you guys like this and want me to keep on writing and explain my loveless love life please leave a comment a vote. :3 And I'll take any advice ;)