Jailbreak ?Maxian?

Now that the thought of being attracted to Max had entered my mind, I couldn't get it to go away. I would find myself watching him randomly, observing how he does things and picking up on every detail of his movement. I found beauty in every way that he operated. It's been exactly three days since this attraction set in and it's been torturing me every hour of the day.

Part of me want to let Max know and have it go somewhere. The rational side of me screams that this is a horrible idea. Max is young and sweet, he only has a small set back holding him back from taking on the world. I don't want to add on to that set back. If he were to end up with me, would we last when he got out? The answer is no, because I would not want to hold him back from getting a full life experience.Think of how sad it would be for him knowing that he will never get to live a happy life with the one he loves. I could never do that to him. So I will keep this to myself and let it go away on its own.

Tonight would be interesting. It's Wednesday, and Wednesday is the day our cell block goes to the showers. Would I be that guy that creepily watches another guy in the prison shower. God, I sure hope not.

"You're being really quiet," Max says, sitting across from me at our normal table. It was the end of dinner, meaning shower time was only a few short minutes away. "Is something bothering you?"

"No," I lie. "Just thinking."

"Whatcha thinking about?" he inquirers.

"Do you think you'll write me when you get out?" I blurt out unexpectedly.

Max bites his lip, carefully planning his next response. "I didn't really think about it. It feels weird, thinking that you won't be able to leave here with me. I think I'll really miss you. I'll have to write you for sure and give you my number.

His response warms my heart but I feel bad that he feels obligated to keep in contact. I really don't want to hold him back. "You should probably just forget about me and leave this place in the dust at the first chance you get. Once you're free again this'll be nothing but a bad memory and you'll forget all about me. You'll have a happy little life with a nice job, beautiful wife, and picture perfect children. You can just go back to living a normal life."

"But that isn't what I want," he states firmly. "Maybe at one time I wanted the picture perfect lifestyle but that's nothing but bullshit. There's better things I can do with my life."

"Anything is better than this though," is all I can say.

"You're right," he nods. "I wish you didn't have to be stuck here."

"Maybe I'll escape someday," I joke. "I'll go and see how you're doing on the outside and just live it up for a few days before I get caught."

Max reaches across the table and takes my hand into his, calmly rubbing circles over my skin. "I wish you could, Ian, I really do. In fact, I wish you could just leave here forever with me."

"That would be the best." We both smile and lock eyes. We stay like this, the world around us just melting away into meaningless white noise. I want nothing more than to lean in and kiss him but I know that would be an absolutely horrible idea.

The buzzer brings us back into the real world. It's time to leave the cafeteria and go into the shower block.

<m>

Thankfully, nothing happened in the shower block. So now Max and I were in our cell for the night. We were in our respective bunks, laying in the dark. I was waiting for sleep to take over and could only assume that Max was either doing the same or already asleep.

Movement from the top draws my attention and I see Max climb down from his bunk. His eyes meet mine and I can tell from his expression that he thought I was asleep.

"What's up?" I ask him, sitting up.

He takes a seat next to me and sighs. "I can't sleep so I was just going to walk around until I felt tired."

"Does that actually work?" I ask.

"Not usually," he shakes his head. "But it's better than just laying there."

"You can lay with me," I suggest. "If you think it will help."

He nods eagerly and we both lay down. I wrap my arms around him and pull him close, wanting him to feel safe and comfortable. Within minutes I hear the sounds of him sleeping and not long after I find myself drifting off.