I Feel Like I'm Drowning - Joshler

"Mom"

Tyler tried to call his mother, his voice weak and hoarse.

He had medications to take, medications which the dosage increased as the months passed, in his case, every 3 months, and he always dreaded those times when his doctor offered him a stronger dosage.

With some patients, methylphenidate didn't work. In these cases, the doctor stopped the treatment. With Tyler, it worked, but after a while once he was adjusted to the prescribed dosage, the effects dissipated and increasing the dose was the only way to help manage the disorder properly.

That day, Tyler exited his psychologist's office with a prescription of 40 mg of methylphenidate to be taken daily, two tablets to take, one in the morning and another one at noon. And he knew oh so well what was waiting for him, his body usually needing 3 to 4 days to adjust to a new dosage.

A few hours after taking his second and last tablet of the day, Tyler was surprised when the only side effects he felt were this usual lack of appetite and a very mild headache.

Not that he was complaining.

He was wrong not to go out and enjoy as much as he could, thinking that maybe this time he wouldn't have to suffer the hell that awaited him every first week every three months.

When night time came, he wasn't so lucky tough.

It was 2:45, and he couldn't help but move and turn around, trying to find a comfortable position, hoping to make his uneasiness disappear.

Uneasiness, including those damn headaches and stomachaches that made him wince in pain, his body temperature high and his forehead covered with small drops of sweat.

"Mom .." He tried a second time, the first having given nothing.

Still not receiving any sign of life from his still sleeping mother, he began to cry softly, the pain only increasing and preventing him from going back to sleep.

In moments like these, he didn't have any problem concentrating. The pain being the only thing he could think of,  he almost regretted the frustration of his inability to concentrate and his inattention which usually were a hell for him, and were why he had to take these pills in the first place.

He began chanting a chorus of "mom, please.."mentally slapping himself for closing his door as he went to sleep.

He had never been so happy to hear his mother's voice when she vigorously opened the door of his room, panicked.

Panicked, but awake.

"Tyler??"

She rushed and sat down beside her son and lit the little bedside lamp there was next to his bed.

Her frown deepened when she saw the condition her baby was in, body curled up in a ball and shaking, tear stained face, frowning, his puffy red eyes half lidded looking at her pleadingly, begging her to lessen his pain.

"Aw baby"

She ran a hand through his damp hair, massaging his scalp, her other hand rubbing his arm up and down soothingly. She hated to see him in this state.

She couldn't really do a thing to help him, Tyler knew that too, but he could use some company, and his mother would be the last one to refuse to give him any.

"How long have you been like this?" She asked softly, concerned.

Tyler just shrugged, closing his eyes, allowing more tears to fall.

"Did it wake you?"

He nodded slowly this time.

Kelly's face softened, trying to find a way to relief some of his pain.

"Baby you know I can't give you anything else because of those meds, d'you want some water? Anything to eat?"

Tyler shook his head, frown deepening. Swalowing something was the last thing he wanted right now, his symptoms making him nauseous.

"God you're burning up." Kelly said, feeling his warm skin. "Wait here." She was out the door in a second.

Where do you want me to go. Tyler thought.

Not even a minute after she was back with a wet cloth, placing it on his forehead, the cool water being a bit releiving.

Tyler sighed, his wimpers had stopped, leaving some occasional tears still falling, his mother's presence calming him a little.

"What else can I do honey?"

"..stay" he said in a tiny, barely audible voice.

Kelly smiled softly at this and brought her hand back to his hair, strocking gently.

"Of course. I'll get my pillow."

She kissed his forehead and went to get her pillow, sneaking under the covers beside him once she was back and bringing him close, hugging him protectively, still strocking his hair and turning the lamp off.

They both were comfortable, bodies pressed together and Tyler's warm forehead burried in her neck, breath uneven as he tried not to throw up. His tears had stopped by now, leaving a constant frown on his face.

Kelly broke the silence when she asked. "Do you want me to text Clemens for you so he can explain your absence? 'Cause you're not going anywhere tomorrow, it's only going to get worse."

"m'no, stay" he mumbled.

"I'm right here baby, shh, go to sleep, I'll just send my school an email first thing in the morning, I'm not letting you home alone when in this state."

"Love you"

"I love you too, goodnight sweetheart."

She kissed his forehead and went to sleep too.

"G'nigh"