Chasm

TRIS POV

Inside the fear landscape room, Bryce's face continues to darken with hot blood underneath his cheeks. Since we are practicing for our final test with Lauren's fears again this year, I assume that he is having to battle her phobia of public humiliation.

"So, what jobs are you guys going to pick next week?" Christina asks casually, pulling her eyes away from the sight of Bryce's misery.

Dez shrugs. "Whatever is available for me, I guess. I don't want to be a guard though, for sure," she says.

"Me neither. I'm thinking something along the lines of working in a store in the Pit. You know, with clothes, makeup, piercings. Something like that." Christina turns to me. "What about you, Tris?"

"I have no idea," I answer honestly. It hasn't crossed my mind yet. While juggling initiation, an investigation, and my rehabilitated relationship, my life after initiation hasn't been at the forefront of my thoughts.

"Oh, come on!" Dez exclaims. "You can be anything you want to be, even a leader. You really have no preference?"

I shake my head. "Not particularly." Any typical job will be fine as long as I have a place to live, food, basic necessities. After bouncing from one faction to the next during wartime, I don't care what work I am assigned to, so long as it provides me with some stability. Maybe I will choose to be an ambassador to another faction, or an initiation instructor like Tobias, though I don't think anyone would take me seriously.

But who knows if I will keep my chosen occupation anyway. The city is on the verge of erupting again, and it could easily send us all into a spiraling disaster, where a common life isn't attainable.

"It's fine, we have some time to decide," Christina reassures me. "Although I did want to discuss rooming with both of you..."

Dez claps her hands together with excitement. "That would be so fun!"

I don't want to ruin their obvious enthusiasm, so I stay silent off to the side, watching the next initiate fight off imaginary demons.

Unfortunately, Christina picks up on it swiftly. "What's that look for, Tris?" she questions. "You don't want to live with us or something?"

"No, of course not," I reply, kicking absentmindedly at the floor. "In any other circumstance, I would. It's just...I got another offer."

Across the room, Tobias monitors the progress of each initiate in the practice fear landscape. When nobody happens to be glancing his way, he manages to flash me an almost unnoticeable smile, one that is mostly communicable through his captivating eyes. It reminds me of last night, of how I stared into them as we united ourselves as one.

Christina follows my gaze. "Oh, how cute," she coos.

Dez tilts her head. "I don't get it." Christina flicks her temple, causing her to cry out dramatically, "Ow!"

Christina lowers her voice as she explains my reasoning. "Hello? She is going to live with Four, duh."

"Ohhh," Dez says, her brown eyes wide with realization. "That makes sense. Although it is so weird to me that you two are together, no offense. I will just probably always see him as my instructor, you know?"

"Yeah, I understand," I mutter.

The conversation drops for the time being. We continue to wait our turn until each of us gets the opportunity to practice the awareness we have in the fear landscape and the power to manipulate each obstacle. As a Divergent, it is relieving that I don't have to map out each of my fears and can change my surroundings without the worry of being picked out between everyone else.