tellonym ? luwoo

OKAY SO

1. THIS STORY REACHED 10K

AND I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY EXCEPT THANK YOU ALL SO FUCKING MUCH. THIS MEANS THE ABSOLUTE WORLD TO ME HONESTLY.

2. i can't reply to comments or see things in view as reader???? what????

3. so when rosie (my girlfriend) and i went out with her friend yesterday i held her hand in public, she rested her head on my lap while i played with her hair, anD KISSED ME FUCK as well as a bunch of other shit that made my heart race.

i'm so in love yall have no idea

anyway here's renkun??? kunjun??
~

kunyounot: i'm coming to see you

huang.rj: i just got off break, can you wait till i'm off?

kunyounot: no, this is important

huang.rj: how important

kunyounot: probably the most important thing in our relationship thus far

huang.rj: fine, but you have to buy a drink so my boss doesn't get suspicious

kunyounot: as if i wasn't gonna get you to make me a drink💓💓

kun walks down to the bar, the route as familiar as the back of his hand.

it's the bad memories the bar holds that cause him to know the way there and back so perfectly. namely, his heartbreak, the reason he struggles so much with speaking a certain three words.

the first 'i love you' he had ever recieved was simple apology for the wounds left on kun's body after a fight, for the bruises and scratches and blood that he was okay with because minhyuk loved him, right?

wrong. he left kun alone after the younger refused sex with him, because he didn't feel confident or beautiful enough anymore. the bruises that felt permanent and the scars and the black eye made him a broken shell of the boy he once was, all because minhyuk couldn't follow through with his words and love kun the way he so desperately needed to be loved.

turning to alcohol to numb the memories and the pain might not have been the best idea, but it worked. it brought him back to life, temporarily reignited the spark inside him.

it also, by chance, brought him to the attention of huang renjun.

a beautiful bartender with a beautiful heart, he brought the spark back and it lasted. kun felt it when he laid in bed that night, sober on a friday night for the first time in months.

then the groupchat came along and kun and renjun's lives became intertwined without a decision made on either's behalf. it was easier that way, they had an excuse to see each other outside of the bar now, but kun was terrified. the flame renjun lit inside him wasn't going away, in fact it only grew larger as the weeks went by.

renjun asking him to be his boyfriend was easily one of the happiest days of kun's life. this perfect boy, who has no scars and no fears and just the most beautiful smile kun has ever seen, wants him too. kun felt alive that day and every day since, really truly alive.

kun never wanted renjun to have to listen to kun cry, or hear about his problems, or to pity him, so he never mentioned the mistreatment from minhyuk and the longterm effects it has had on him. the only time kun considered even telling renjun his history was the first time renjun let 'i love you' slip through his lips.

now, kun had only ever heard one other someone say that to him, and there was always an apology in his eyes. minhyuk was sorry for loving him, because loving kun meant it was okay for him to break kun in unimaginable ways.

there was no apology in renjun's eyes, or on the tip of his tongue. only a fierce passion that matched that of the flame in kun's chest.

but he couldn't say it back. he tried explaining it to renjun, but the panic and fear and leftover pain must've shone through in his voice, as renjun simply smiled and said, "you don't have to say it back, or tell me why you can't, if you aren't ready. but i am and i need you to know that i'm so very in love with you, kun, and i am never going to hurt you. not in a million, billion, quintillion years."

kun cried, to say the least, as he sputtered out apologies that renjun halted with a kiss.

kun's flame grew quite a bit that day.

over the eight months since, renjun told kun how much he loves him everyday without failure, and kun wished so badly to say it back.

and now, as he swings open the door to the last place his heart broke and the first place he felt the  consistent, comforting, beautiful flame in his chest, kun knows he's ready.

"hey baby," renjun smiles at him. "are you alright?"

kun nods, sitting at the stool directly in front of his boyfriend.

"what can i get you?" the younger asks.

"one, single shot," kun smiles. his boyfriend laughs. "alright, weirdo."

he waits in silence as the boy pours a shot and then takes it quickly. "renjun."

"yeah?"

"i love you."

kun swears, he's never seen anything so magnificent as the way renjun's eyes light up when he hears those three words.

"and i'm sorry it's taken so long for me to tell you, but i wanted to be sure," kun inhales deeply before continuing. "before we met, i was in an abusive relationship. i was told that love was the reason he hit me and scratched me and forced me to do things i really didn't want to do. he left me and i was alone, that's... that's why i started coming here. i didn't want to tell you because i didn't want you to look at me any different than you did. but i trust you enough to hold my heart in your hands, because i know you aren't going to hurt me. because, i love you."

renjun leaves the actual bar and comes over to kun's stool, cupping his boyfriend's cheek in his hand. his eyes, with tears pooling up, shine light stars, his smile is the moon, and his lips, which meet kun's in a perfect mix of passion and pure bliss, feel as warm and as comforting as sunlight.

in the eleven months since they first met, the ache minhyuk left has disappeared. the scars have faded, both mental and physical, and his heart has found a home that cares for him and respects him. it doesn't hurt anymore, because, without knowing, renjun has put all kun's pieces back together, right where they should be, and in doing so gained the trust and love of someone who, some time prior, didn't believe in that.

and he lit aflame the boy who was completely put out.

~
thiS CHAPTER MADE ME CRY OKAY I LOVE RENKUN BYE-