she's not afraid / / n.h.

  Her

I let my fingers intertwine with his as his lips firmly press against my forehead. "Stay with me, baby..." I lean closer to him. "Always."

I wake up hours later, my head pounding and a nauseous feeling sweeping over me. I barely make it to the toilet before emptying myself of all my lunch. When I'm done I lay on the cool tile, unwilling to move. Must've eaten something bad earlier. I don't overthink it and eventually I drag myself to the den and dig out my favorite book. Read the thing probably a hundred times and it just gets better every time. I make my way through several chapters before my phone rings and I notice my best friend's name on the screen. I smile and grab a pillow, settling into the couch since I know I'll be here a while.

 

Niall

I pause the game and lumber into the kitchen for a beer. My phone beeps and I noticed that Lou's texted me. I grin at his cheeky self-invitation and grab an extra drink for him. Before I can get back to the tv he's already busted in the door and wrapped me in a hug. "Good to see you too," I pat his back sarcastically. He eagerly reaches for his beer and plops on the sofa. "Alright team!"
      * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 
  "Nialler!" Louis waves his hand in front of my face. "Hey man. Pay attention! We just scored!" I blink and swat his hand away, staring at the flashing screen. I feel him staring at me but I ignore him until he turns the tv off. "Whatcha do that for?" He slaps the side of my head. "Cos you aren't paying attention. What's going on?" I sigh and shrug. "Let it go, Lou. Nothing's wrong." He glares at me. "Spill. Is it a girl?" I choke on my beer and he has to slap my back. "Damn Louis. Tryna kill me?" He chortles. "So that's it? You've got a girlfriend?" It's my turn to shoot him a stern look. "She's not my girlfriend." He just laughs again. "Cmon Niall, lighten up! I'm here to help. Now tell me. Everything." "Lou!" I grumble, but he just waits patiently. "Okay, so there's this sweet girl I met at the club earlier. She caddied for me and  Grimmie and then I saw her after lunch. She makes the best damn cookies I've ever had. And cake. I told her she oughtta have a bakery but she says it's too much money. And she likes to sing and dance an-" Louis stares at me with wide eyes. "Hold up, mate. You sound totally whipped." I smack his shoulder. "Am not!" He just flips me off. "So...what's her name?" My head snaps up and he just looks at me funny. "Her name is..." But before I can say it my phone has interrupted me. It's a strange number but I decide to pick it up anyway. "Hello?" I wait, and there's no answer. I'm about to hang up when I hear it. "N-niall?" I feel a huge smile cover my face and I don't even try to hide it this time. "Hey there..."

Her

My leg starts bouncing frantically. I don't even know why I called him. I feel incredibly stupid and my mind quickly turns over the few options I could elicit in order to end the call. Faking a bad connection, dropping the phone ... but it's too late. He's already answered, waiting. I've got to say something. "Um, hi." Real smooth, woman. Get it together. I hear snickering from his end, but it's not him. "Get 'er, mate!" And then more laughter explodes. My cheeks burn as Niall's mortified voice replies. "Hi, yourself. Everything alright?" I groan softly, forgetting that he can probably hear every sound I make. "Yeah. I mean, not really. No, no I'm fine. I'm sorry. I don't really know what I'm doing." He chuckles lightly. "S'alright love. Something on your mind?" I panic a little bit. That's an understatement. But I'm not about to tell him about the dreams, the haunting images and memories that won't go away. Some things are best kept to oneself. And suddenly it hits me. I'm just setting myself up for a repeat of the last time. What am I doing? This, all of this, whatever it was, was a terrible idea.  "I'm sorry, Niall, this isn't a good idea." I hang up the phone and slam it down on the table, hard. I hear a little snap, I think my screen protector has a new crack decorating the front. I decide to throw a pillow across the room, but it's not good enough. So I send a book flying into the wall, leaving a dent in the wallpaper. That wallpaper. Loved the colorful floral when I saw it on my aunt's dining room walls, but now it's mocking me. All I see is the daisies. Those cursed, ugly daisies. I even smell them. So I let out a guttural, animalistic scream and charge to the wall, scratching, scraping. The paper comes off in long shreds as I continue to growl at it. And all the while, the words echo in my head. "Daisies for my baby. Your favorites, babe. Here, take these daisies. It's not even a question baby, just put them in the kitchen." The kitchen. I spin around, staring through the open doorway, breathing heavily, before letting out a final scream and rushing into the room, letting my shriek fill the space, bouncing off the walls as I toss pans and silverware all about the floor. Suddenly I feel arms around my waist, stopping me from continuing my onslaught in the kitchen. I growl, snapping at the broad arms encircling me. It doesn't even register that this is a burglar, a housebreaker, a serial killer, somebody to be afraid of. I can only think of the mess that must be cleaned, the food that should be on the table, waiting for him. A firm, yet caring voice speaks into my ear. "Stop it, love. S'okay. I've got you."

   

   oOH who is it ? and what could have happened to make her have these reactions ? what's her name and why does it have Niall so interested ? anyways I'm sure anyone that's read this at all wasn't even expecting an update but I promise I'm still here !! I actually had about half of this chapter written a few weeks ago but got some writers block .. ugh. and then I wrote the rest in about 25 minutes. I guess that's called inspiration lol. thanks for reading !! I hope I won't take so long to update again but I really can't promise anything :( ❤️