moonlight // negan

I stayed with Negan that evening.  It seemed as things were going to go back to normal, or as normal as they could be.  Negan and I spoke most of the night.  He was becoming more open to me and I was thankful for that.  

"It was just me, Simon, and Justin when this all started.  We all knew we needed people, and quickly.  The Sanctuary was established and we really let everyone who stepped near inside and since then we grew.  Shit hit the fan, and we had to start cracking down on things.  People were taking advantage of the generosity and that's when we developed everything you see.  Took a lot of death but only a few months into this shit we had it established."  Negan began to explain.  

"Damian found himself here.  He was alone.  Simon was up on post one day and saw him limping to the gates and almost mistook him for a walker.  He was half dead, been walking for days carrying one thing of water.  He was a tough fucking kid, only sixteen he said.  We took him in, patched him up.  Not going to lie, he was on my hip like a lost fucking puppy after he could walk again.  Wanted to learn the ropes.  So I took him in, trained him to fight, lead, whatever it took.  I saw a lot of him in me and wanted the best for him so I just let him go.  He did his own thing but at the end of the day he was always a Savior and would've done anything for the people here."  He further stated.  

Negan really raised Damian to be him.  

"If anything were to happen, Simon and I agreed that Damian was going to take over.  We didn't like talking about it much but knew it was a conversation to be had.  We never got around to telling Damian though, wish he would've known."  

"He did know."  I spoke up.  "We talked about it before.  He tried to convince me that it'd be me or Simon but I always knew it would be him.  We didn't talk about it long, both made us upset honestly."  

"I have to admit, you look hot when you hold Lucille."  Negan joked. 

"I think he knew deep down that it would've been him to take over if necessary.  He just didn't want to admit it.  He looked up to you.  You really stood by him and he did for you.  He went out fighting, something I know you would do too."  I reminded Negan.  

"You're right.  Shitty circumstances but god damn you're right.  That's my biggest fear.  Letting my people down, going out without a fight and just letting all that we worked for end."  He admitted. 

"That's not going to happen, Negan.  Your people look up to and so do I, and if it ever came down to it, no one would hesitate to fight for you."  

"You look up to me?"  He asked, taken aback.  

"Of course I do, baby.  You're what people need in a world gone to shit."  I laughed.  

Negan pulled me closer to his chest and kissed the top of my forehead.  I was getting tired but I could stay up and talk to him all night.  Considering the night he had before however, he needed to sleep.  

"Don't fall asleep yet."  I heard him say.  

"You need to sleep.  You've been up for too long."  I told him.  He sighed, knowing I was right.  

"Goodnight, doll."  

__

I woke up the next morning to an empty bed.  I woke up and looked around but Negan was nowhere to be found.  Lucille was gone, indicating he had started his day.  I looked at the clock and it read 9:30 a.m.  No wonder he was already up.  Deciding to get up myself, I went to the bathroom to shower and get ready for the day.  As I was getting dressed, there was a knock on the door.  Knowing it wouldn't be Negan, I quickly threw a shirt over top of me and opened the door.  Essie stood there with a laundry basket.  

"Long time, no see."  She smiled.  "I'm just here to pick things up."  She said.  

"Can I help you?"  I asked.  "It gets quite boring sometimes and I've been meaning to find you, actually."  I admitted. 

"Yeah, Negan told me.  Sorry, being in charge of housekeeping leads me constantly busy but I would love some help, and some girl time."  She smiled.  I let her go through the room and grab Negan and I's shared laundry and followed her to a large room where I haven't been before.  It seemed that this place was a laundry room before this started, as there where three large sinks in the room and a two sets of a washer and dryer.  "We don't use those often, trying to conserve water and everything.  So most of the time is hand washing but we have a lot of help so it isn't too gruesome.  I won't let you do that however, if you want, you can help fold laundry?"  She asked.  I nodded and went over to a rack of drying clothes and began to sort into piles.  

Time went by and Essie and I made conversation.  I learned about her life before this started.  She was just starting out as a school teacher and her husband was a small cafe owner.  She said they had a really great life and she's lucky that they've stayed together through all of this.  I didn't realize she was married and I learned that her husband was Isaac, who I've met previously.  

"We met Negan like everyone else.  Found this area kind of near the beginning, maybe about three or four months in to everything.  We had just lost our group and it was me, him, and a young girl so we just walked for days until we came across this.  It was like our saving grace."  Essie admitted.  "I've got to say, at first I was absolutely terrified, but I guess the more you know Negan and the longer you're with him, you understand.  But you get that first hand."  She smiled.  

I nodded, agreeing with her.  I liked being able to talk to Essie so comfortably.  She quickly became a friend, something I needed after loosing Damian so suddenly.  

"If you want, you can keep helping out.  I'm sure Negan wouldn't mind and I certainly appreciate your help."  Essie offered.  

"I'd love that, thank you."  I accepted.  I departed ways with Essie to find Negan.  He was back in the room, writing at his desk.  

"I was wondering when you'd get back."  He asked, getting up to greet me.  

"I was with Essie, she asked if I wanted to keep helping with housekeeping.  I didn't mind it."  I told him.  

"You know you don't have to work right?"  He asked me.  

"No, but I liked it.  It kept me busy and it was nice to talk to her." 

"Then I don't see a problem.  But you'll have to skip tomorrow.  I want you to come with me to Alexandria."  He told me.  

"Isn't it a bit early?"  I asked him.  

"It is, but need to make sure they are obeying.  We'll leave at 7 tomorrow."  

I nodded and he went back to writing at his desk and I grabbed my journal, sitting on the chair in the corner.