Ghostly // Joshler

Unedited

  "Dad, say something." Anthony repeated for the second time. I looked at Caden, who was looking at me. "D- when did you two- you know?" I asked. They both blushed. "Dad! you can't just ask that?" Anthony exclaimed. I shook my head. "I think I have a right to ask when my son hands me a positive pregnancy test." I said pointing out our current situation. He scratched the back of his next awkwardly. "We've been... sleeping together, but the last time was last month." He said slowly. I glanced at Caden again. "Have you told Dallon yet?" He shook his head. "We thought we'd tell you first... to see how you would react." I nodded before sighing. "Have you to talked about it, to each other?" They both looked at each other. "He wants to keep it, but..." Anthony said looking back at me, I bit the inside of my cheek. "I don't think it'll be good for his mind, and the dysphoria." I sighed. Caden just laughed. "I'm willing to suffer if it means that we can have kids, or at least one." Anthony walked over and sat next to Caden, pulling him close. "You said he wants to keep it? how do you feel about it, Anthony?" I know that the dad has no say of what happens, I just wanted to know how he feels. He bit his lip before sighing. "I- I just don't want him or her to end up like me... I can't garente that I will be a good parent." Caden laughed. "I think that it will be okay in the end." He whispred before kissing Anthony. I smiled. "I'm going to check on Logan, make sure you figure out how to tell Dallon." I said before walking out of the room and down the hall. "Dad?" I turned to see Gabe standing in his door way. "Hey, what's up?" He looked at the floor. "Is Logan right?" I bit my lip before bending down in front of him. "About what?" He looked up at me. "That you don't care about us?" My heart broke. "No, of course not... when did she say this?" He smiled slightly. "She said it when Anthony and I got home." I nodded. "Okay, I'll talk to her. What do you want for dinner?" He smiled brightly. "Pizza! homemade pizza." I nodded with a smiled. He then ran back into his room.

  I walked up to Logan's door and knocked. "If you're not Josh, then come in... but if you're Josh, then the front door is down stairs." I rolled my eyes before walking in. She glared at me. "Get out," I shook my head, "I don't want you in here! I wa-" She stopped when I sat down on her desk chair. "No, please keep going... You've been holding that in for an year now, I know theirs more. I love to hear more about how you feel about the man that raised you." She shook her head. "Get out." I laughed As I stood up. "Ya know, one of these days... I won't be here... I'll be- my guess- six feet under, and when that day comes, whether it's tomorrow or years from now, I don't want you to say that I wasn't there for you. Cause the reality, you weren't there for me." I walked to the door and out into the hall. I turned to her. "I'm making pizza for dinner... I'll yell when it's done." With that I walked away.

   I was sitting in the kitchen, rolling out pizza dough when someone knocked on the front door. I quickly put the rolling pin down and ran to the door. I opened it and almost closed it immediately. "What the hell do you want?" I asked the man standing at my door. He was standing there awkwardly. "I know the way I've been, that you might not want to talk... but can I came in? I'm sorry about how I acted in the bar earlier, it was really uncalled for." Brendon said avoiding my gaze. "Do you know where he is?" I asked, it almost coming out as a whisper. He shook his head. "No... but can we talk about this inside?" I bit the inside of my cheek and nodded. I moved out of the way, letting him in. He closed the door behind him. I nodded my head towards the kitchen, silently telling him to follow me.

   We both walked into the kitchen causing Gabe to look up from his homework. "Who is he?" He questioned. I looked at Brendon, who was looking at Gabe with teary eyes. "Brendon, this is Gabe... Gabe this is Brendon." I told the ten year old truthfully, I didn't want to lie to him... I did it enough. Gabes eyes widened. "Oh." He whispred out before running up and hugging him. Brendon looked at me and mouthed "thank you" before wrapping his arms around Gabe, who pulled away looking frightened. "A-are you going to take me away?" He asked, tears filling his eyes. Brendon shook his head right way and bent down. "As much as I want to... I'm not. I hope, though, that you will let me get to know you... or even let me be in your life?" Brendon said wipping Gabes cheeks with his thumbs. Gabe smiled and nodded. B then looked at me. "Are you okay with that also." I nodded. Gabe squealed. "Yay! Now I have three dads." I smiled at him, so did Brendon. "Hey, why don't you finish your homework in Anthony's room so Brendon and I can talk?" He nodded before grabbing his work and leaving the room.

    Brendon walked over and sat on one of the stools. I walked over to the pizza dough. "Thank you, Josh. What you did... I don't deserve it. You could of lied about who I am... or turned me away at the door." I looked at him. "No need to thank me... I think it was about he met you, even if I don't like it." He laughed. "Jealousy will always be apart of you." I glared at him. "Don't push it, Urie." I said smirking, "Now, tell me what you know." I said looking back at what I was doing. "The day he "left" he was supposed to meet me," I looked at him, "I reached out to him and asked him to... I never say him though, he never showed. I thought that he changed his mind on meeting me." He kept his gaze on the counter top. I looked down then back up. "What did you say to him?" I  questioned. He laughed. "I wasn't asking him to bone, if that's what you think," I laughed. "no, I messaged him saying it was me. He didn't believe me... I told him to ask my a question only I would know, he did and I got it right. He then asked how I was alive and I asked if we could meet because it would be a pain in the ass to type it all out. He was hesitant at first, I think, because he didn't reply right way. He then sent me a message saying he would met me." He took a deep breath. "I told him when and where. When that day came, I got to the park early. I waited for hours for him before finally leaving." I frowned. "I... I believe you. I'm sorry I blamed you." He chuckled. "No, you shouldn't be sorry. I would of blamed me if I was in your shoes. I was really shady." We both laughed. I walked over and put one pizza in the oven. "Do you think he ran, or...?" I looked at him and closed the oven door before walking over to him. "Honestly, I don't know. Everyone's telling me that he ran away... but I don't want to believe it. It doesn't help that he left his phone, and it was wiped clean." Brendon scrunched up his eyebrows. "You okay?" He looked at me and shook his head slightly. "Yeah, sorry I haven't had much sleep." I laughed. "Dad ar- oh, I guess not... told you He wasn't crazy." I looked at the doorway to see Anthony and Caden. "This is Brendon, Brendon this is my son Anthony, and Dallon son Caden." Brendon raised an eyebrow. "He's Dallon's" "He's the Brendon." Anthony and B said at the same time causing me to laugh. "Yes, to both of you're questions. Dallon adopted Caden five years ago." He smiled. "That's fucking awesome... damn I missed a lot." The two teens walked over and sat down. "Does Logan know he's here?" Anthony asked. Brendon looked at me questionably. I shook my head. "No." I whispred. "Why do you look like your hamster just died." I laughed, Anthony and Caden chuckled. "She- Logan's been acting like a-" "-bitch." Anthony said cutting me off. I looked at him, giving him that "are you kidding me look". Brendon looked lost. "What did she do?" He asked looking really concerned. "Lets just say she has you're anger." I told him, "this morning she refused to get dressed. I told her to and she said that she hates me and she told me that she don't have to listen to me because... I'm not her dad." I took a deep breath and bit my lip, trying not to cry. Brendon looked upset, which surprised me. "She said that to you?" I nodded. He shook his head. "That wasn't right. You're more of a father then I am," He whispered, "I- She should be thankful that she had you there for her... I'm thankful that you were there for her, and Gabe, when I wasn't." He had tears falling form his eyes. I walked over and hugged him. Something I never thought I would do a week ago, hell, this morning I never thought I'd be in this position. "Fuck, why am I crying." Anthony whispered. I laughed as B and I pulled away. I wiped my cheeks with the back of my hand, Brendon did the same. The timer went off scaring the shit out of all of us. I walked over and took it out before walking over and putting it on the counter. "Gabe! Food." I yelled, not really thinking that Logan would come down. I was proven wrong when I heard her door open. I put a piece on a plate just as Gabe ran down the stairs screaming "pizza". He ran into the kitchen and straight to the plate I just sat in down. Brendon laughed. "Someone loves pizza." Gabe looked at him and nodded before turning his attention back to his pizza. I looked at the doorway just as Logan entered the room. Brendon turned to look at her and her eyes widened. "Dad?" She said happily, it hurt me hearing her calling him that considering she called me "Josh" earlier. Brendon didn't say anything. He then shook his head. "I don't deserve that tittle," he looked at me, "but he does." Logan looked at the floor and shook her head. "He's not my father." Brendon laughed. "Well, if he's not then neither am I. Can I use your bathroom?" He asked looking at me. I nodded. "Yeah, it down the hall." He got up and walked away. Logan just stood there staring at the floor. I held out a plate. "Here." I said not moving. She looked up at me before walking away. I sighed. "She'll come around Dad," Anthony said, "and I think Brendon will help you.