YFMTS Reader Insert

You and the band were on the bus driving on a deserted road surrounded by nothing but sand, distant mountains, and some shrubs. You were unsure where you were going as Dee Jay said it was a surprise. He was driving, Puff sat next to him in the passenger's seat, Benatar sat behind the fluffy haired brunette, and Axel beat you to the seat right behind Dee Jay, accompanied by his pet hawk. You stood beside Axel with a hand holding onto his seat for balance. It was a silent drive before Puff spoke.

"Dee Jay. How long till our next stop, man?"

"I know what'll pass the time!" Benatar beamed. "I'll play my new song for you!"

The three boys shook their heads and started to complain. Bentar didn't listen as he began to play his song that you had to agree didn't sound too well. You lightly covered your ears unlike the rest of the guys who shoved the palm of their hands onto the sides of their heads. Even Axel's hawk looked like it was in pain.

"Benny! It's great!" you shouted which made him stop playing. "But please stop it."

"But you haven't heard the best bit!" he smiled as he continued to play his song.

The bus started swerving all over the road as Benatar just kept going even with everyone's collective cries.

"Woah! Shit!"

"My ears are bleeding!"

"You gotta stop!"

"Ben, enough!"

He finally stopped, which made you sigh in relief.

"Benatar! The CIA would consider your song a weapon of mass destruction! Beached whales would throw themselves back into the sea! Gay guys would run away screaming from a monsoon of penises! Your song sucks, dude!"

"Not your cup of tea, then?" Benatar asked.

"As Saud as my witness, you'll never play that song again!" Puff provoked.

"Man, I need to sanctify my ears." Dee Jay complained.

"I got some sweet new jokes!" Puff beamed.

"Haven't we been through enough for one day?!" Axel cried.

As you were about to pass a gas station, the bus broke down.

"At least we broke down at a truck stop." You spoke, trying to give them a little hope.

"Hooray for us." Puff said in a sarcastic tone.

You all got out and Dee Jay grabbed some tools and started to fix the engine.

"You just had to ask didn't you?" Dee Jay grumbled at Axel.

The metal head rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled out an apology.

"Come on you three, let's see if someone here can help us." You led the way as everyone but Dee Jay followed. You all stopped in your tracks as you saw a group of people walking towards you.

"Good evening!" Puff greeted. "You inbred fuckin' hillbillies." he mumbled. "My friends and I are broke down here. Give us a hand?"

He grabs the big guy's shoulder and when he pulls back his entire arm had came off and was in Puff's grasp.

"Holy shit." you muttered under your breath.

"Thanks?" Puff said, confused as he backed away, dropping the arm. The three of you began to back away with him once Puff had gotten closer to you. "Dudes! These aren't hillbillies! They're zombillies!"

They stalked closer and closer to you as you were backing up. You looked back and gasped as Dee Jay was still fixing the bus. Puff spotted his microphone stand on the ground and picked it up, twirling it in the air above his head.

"Back undead hicks!" He got into a defensive stance as Axel pulled out his drumsticks from his back pocket. "Dee Jay, how's it goin'?"

"Spot me five more minutes, man." Dee Jay assured.

"I know! I'll soothe them to sleep with my song!" Benatar chimed in.

"Motherfucker, I told you I never wanna hear that song again!" Puff added.

"Man, fuck no!" Dee Jay complained.

"I would really rather not." Axel commented.

You guys started to fight back once they were close enough. You grabbed a drum cymbol that was just on the ground and used it to wack one in the face.

You heard a loud thud behind you to see Benatar whacked a zombillies head off. "He was coming from behind you."

Somewhere during the conflict Puff had escaped and was standing on the roof of the bus.

"Hey, up here! You rotting redneck cousin fuckers like comedy?" Puff shouted.

"Ok, now we're dead for sure." Axel addressed.

Puff began to tell the zombillies his awful jokes. "If you marry your sister, and then eat her brains, you might be a zombillie! Hah, getter done!" They just looked at Puff confused and groaned. "Hey, why do country hookers like zombillies? Cuz they always leave a tip! Eh? Eh? This thing on?" he asked, referring to his microphone.

The zombillies just became angry. Groaning in protest for having to deal with the bad jokes being told.

"Great Puff, you've fucked us even more! Oh fuck, we're gonna die!" you cried, grabbing Benatar and Axel and hugging them both.

"Wait! Wait! I got one more! How do you put a baby zombillie to sleep? You decapitate it and set it on fire!"

The zombillies started groaning louder, and were angrier.

"Puff! Enough you're just pissing them off!" you shouted to the light brown-haired boy on the top of the bus.

"Let's go! Now!" Dee Jay said as he closed the hood of the engine and the zombillies started creeping closer to him. You all started screaming trying to push them back. The four of you climbed on the top of the bus with Puff and started trembling as the zombillies started climbing on the sides.

"Any last requests? How bout Simora see? That seems good music to die to." Benatar suggested.

"Benatar, that's it! Play your unholy acoustic diarrhea song!" Puff announced.

"But you said you never wanted to hear it again." Benatar reminded him.

"That was before the redneck undead were about to kill our faces off! Play it! It's our only hope!" Puff begged right before he covered his ears which made everyone else do the same.

You watched as Benatar played his song causing the zombillie's to start killing themselves. They ripped their ears off, bashed their skulls in, and stomped on their own heads, just to not be able to hear Benatar's song.

"It's working! Everybody inside! Move, move, move, move!" Puff boomed.

You all safely got in the bus in your original seats with the exception that you were behind Puff because you kept Benatar on the roof of the bus playing his song. Dee Jay turned on the engine and you all cheered when the bus started running.

"Ah yeah baby!"

"Ah, thank God."

"It's over! Our nightmare is over."

"We can finally relax."

Axel's pet hawk flew onto Puff's seat and dropped something in his lap.

"What did that nasty pigeon just drop?" Dee Jay asked, annoyed.

"Probably just another zombie eyeball." Axel assured.

"Uhh..you're half right." Puff added.

"Eww, Zombie balls!"

"That's a Zombie's nut."

"Wait, your guy's balls don't look like that?"

"Note to self, take Axel to the doctor."