It All Started With A Deal

Interesting Concept but Poor Execution

"Get me out of here!" I screamed at my best friend, Athena.

Let me explain, I was currently in the girls' bathroom hiding from a guy who I'd met ten minutes ago who apparently thought my eyes were on my chest. That was all thanks to Athena. I should have known that when she wanted to have a girls' night out, there had to be a catch. One minute we're going to different shops, looking at cute clothes, hot people and, of course, the most important thing, food, and then all of a sudden I was being placed at a table with some guy I'd never even met before.

"Come on, Sapphire, just give him a chance," she tried to reason.

I most certainly will not give him a chance. I glared at her, despite the fact that she couldn't see me. "Johanna Athena Harris—" I could practically hear her cringe at the use of her full name—"if you don't get me out of here, I swear, I will tell Sam Bentley all about the creepy album in your phone, filled with pictures of him!" Though I would never actually do that to her, threatening to embarrass Athena in front of the guy she'd had a major crush on for years was about the only way I was getting out of there.

Thanks to mother nature's many mood swings, it was currently below zero even though it was in the forties yesterday. That was Indiana for you, where mother nature had more mood swings than I did. Since I didn't listen to my little brother, after he'd relentlessly chastised me to bring a coat, I was left defenseless against the brash weather and was unfortunately stranded there unless Athena came back for me.

"Fine, fine!" Athena pleaded. "Truce, okay? You stay for half an hour and then I will come pick you up. Please just give this guy a chance."

I grumbled. That was the third blind date Athena had set me up on that month, and it was only the twelfth. She had some crazy obsession with trying to find me a date. I'd assured her that I was perfectly content with marrying food. Who needed a guy when you could have fries? That was my life motto, unfortunately, Athena had other ideas. "Okay, half an hour, that's all he gets! And if he stares at my boobs one more time I am personally going to throw not only my cup of coffee but his as well—both of which he made me pay for—directly on his head. And don't worry, my cup of coffee will remain full, just in case, because this imbecile thought it would be romantic to order straight black coffee for me even though he's never met me before and I despise coffee almost as much as him." I wasn't saying the guy had to pay for everything on a date, but for a date that I didn't want to go on, nor had any interest in, he could have at least let me order for myself.

Athena paused briefly before speaking, "Okay, so maybe he's not the love of your life, but think about it, you're one guy closer to finding your true love."

I narrowed my eyes at absolutely nothing because unfortunately, Athena was not there for me to actually give her the evil eye. "Love is a lie." And with that, I hung up the phone and started a thirty-minute timer.

"Amen!" I heard a girl, who must have been in her late thirties, next to me cheer. She had been listening to my entire conversation and, by the looks of it, wasn't having too great of a night. Mascara had dripped down her face, ruining her flawless makeup which surely took her hours. She took a huge swig from the flask which had been conveniently resting in her designer bag. The girl seemed far too rich to be crying in the bathroom of a coffee shop whose specialty was tea, because that made total sense.

I gave her a tight smile and offered her a tissue from my bag. She gladly took it and wiped her black tears. I rested my hand on the door handle, taking a deep breath. This is going to be the longest thirty minutes of my life. And with that thought, I triumphantly walked out of the sanctuary that was the bathroom and took a seat next to my so-called date. His eyes were glued to his phone screen, which I was amazed he could see considering his bangs lay sprawled out across his eyes. "That sure took you a while," he sneered, not bothering to look at me. "If you're having lady issues, I sure don't want to hear about your cramps and I won't go buy you any of those nasty products you girls use. So if that's the case, let me know now because if you can't suck it up and deal with the pain, just like any guy could, then I'm leaving."