AFTER Hero

HELLO ANGELS!

"Sometimes it all gets a little too much, but you gotta realize that soon the fog WILL clear up" — Shawn Mendes

*hugs*

* * *

*HERO*

"Yes, thank you so much. See you then." My mouth stretches into a grin and I can't seem to keep still. I need to jump up in victory! I shut off my phone and stretch my arm out to rest it on the glass table.

"Hero, be still." Katy shoots me daggers that could slice through iron in the middle of applying my tree tattoo. My favorite is the snake tattoo. I'm a dedicated life long Slytherin member. The tree comes close to it. I love how bloody wicked it is. The mysterious leafless tree was like a skeleton with secrets. It's detailed. Lonely. The way the branches curve and droop it's as if the tree were calling out in sadness.

"Blimey your hands are cold!" I shrieked when she pressed into my skin. Her fingertips felt like icicles.

33 tattoos and two hours later I'm all set. Since my wardrobe is mostly fitted black that rubs up against my skin, the tattoos will deteriorate throughout the day and Katy has to refill them with a tattoo pen or palette. The pointy tip tickles like a feather when she drags it across my skin. Secretly I hate it. But I don't complain.

We're getting ready to film the shower scene. . .

I don't feel right about it. However this is my career.

But now I'm caught in a battle between my heart and my career. It's tough. At least the intimate scenes are rehearsed. Almost mechanical. Similar to a routine. It's amazing how different a scene is from an actor's stand point. But on screen in flows like magic. Embers of chemistry fly off Jo and I.

With Roger's precise angles. A talented editing crew. Mixed with the perfect song. You would never guess how robotic the sex scenes play out when filming. . . Like every other scene. It's done and done again. . . And then again.

Sometimes we have to cut mid-scene. Switch an angle or two. Change our position. Jo and I are like clay. Constantly being stretched, molded, formed and reformed.

And then we do it all over again while still performing our heart out and aiming for our absolute best. But at the same time it's natural for me to fall into Hardin's personality and who he is as a character. With my strong friendship with Jo, everything between us is a breeze.

But my heart beats for another. . .

Touching Jo will be a challenge.

But I'm an actor.

It's what I do.

I need to keep in the correct mindset - It's Hardin touching Tessa. Not Hero touching Jo.

I'm not betraying her.

I fucking feel like I am!

The artist's do their last touch up on my hair and I pull over a cut off shirt from the yoga scene. I jab Hardin's usual black band on my ring finger. The memory of Livia catching a glimpse of the black ring in my bedroom invades my mind. My lips stretch into a love-sick grin like a big dork. I never thought I would be utterly consumed by someone else. Ever!