Wrong Number, Kid

Peter:

Ned

Nedddddd!

Answer me, it's code red!

???:

Who is this?

How did you get this number?

Peter:

Ned, I think it's pretty obvious who this is

This is no time for kidding around

I need you to meet me at the base

???:

The base?!

Okay I've had enough messing around

You either tell me who you are or I hack you and find out myself

Peter:

*le gasp*

You're not Ned!

Also good luck with hacking my phone😏

???:

...

What the hell is this??

Why can't I hack this firewall?!

Peter:

Hehe 😈

And language!

My ears are young and impressionable

???:

You little shit

And you can't be that young if you have a firewall that

rivals Stark's tech

Peter:

Stark's tech?

As in Tony Stark?

How do you have access to Stark Technology?

*Double le gasp*

Do you know Tony Stark?!

???:

I'll tell you if you tell me your name

Peter:

Yeah, no

You could be a pedophile for all I know

I could probably just hack your phone to find out

But I won't because I'm polite

???:

A pedophile?

So you are a kid!

Peter:

Fudge

Oh would you look at the time!

I have to go!

Bye Mr/Miss Possible Pedophile Person!

Peter's POV

    I refocused from my phone screen to my current problem: hiding from child services. I carefully looked over the edge of the roof, scanning the streets for the people I had been running from in my civilian form. I had managed to duck into an alley long enough to climb up the wall to the roof of a building without getting caught.

    Ever since Aunt May died in a car crash, I had been living in foster homes that had been nothing but pure hell. These child services people will basically stick you with anyone that is willing, so a lot of us usually end up in situations like mine: running from officials and learning to survive on your own.