•|Rudransh|•
I baited my breathe, standing in front of the door with an uneasy tension crawling on my insides.
It's been past five minutes and yet I haven't gotten the courage to go inside...to console her or maybe myself.
Gulping down the lump in my throat, I gently knocked against the door, getting no reply.
"Siya?" I called out hopefully, getting only dead silence in response.
I sighed.
There was no way out to solve it, was there? She doesn't trust me enough and why would she even? I'm the one who had never bothered to make her feel secure and assured.
But these things, I cannot let this hamper what has begun to bloom, even though the connection is fragile, I know it I'd there and I just have to hold onto it.
Intaking a large sip of air, I again raised my hands but quickly pulled back seeing the door opening.
"Are you okay?" I couldn't help but utter as soon as I saw her.
Her face was blank like a white sheet, eyes set on the floor as she continued to ignore my words and shifted aside to give me space.
When I entered the room, the first thing I noticed was the weird silence, a stark contrast to her expression.
Without sparing me a single glance, she started to retreat back to the bathroom, denying to acknowledge my presence.
Before she could take any more steps, I promptly reached for her hands, holding her still.
"Look, whatever happened downstairs-"
Her voice cut my words in a sharp tone. "You don't have to explain it to me"
I shook my head gently in response. "It's not what you're thin-"
"It doesn't matter" she snatched her hand back, tilting her head slightly towards me. "I'm just a forced responsibility anyways"
Her statement stirred something inside me, an unknown blaze which I didn't understand.
"You are not" My voice came more softly than I intended to.
Hearing that, she stopped walking and turned completely.
"I believe I already told you sir" A mock expression passed through her face, as she emphasized on the title. "Do not play with my feelings, I'm no doll. They might not matter to you but for me, they are more than anything"
I took a step closer, watching her almost flinch at the action.
"First of all, you're my wife" I spelled with precision, seeing her jaw tighten. "And no, I have no intention of hurting your feelings. You matter to me and I can never deny that truth"
By now, I was already close enough to share our personal space. She eyed me banefully, the uncertainty still lingered on her face as she maintained her strict composure.
"Also" I rejoined, staring right into her eyes. "Don't ever sir me like that when we are alone. It is necessary during college hours but with all means I'm your husband outside the college"
"I refuse to believe" She interjected dismissively, pushing my chest with a little too much force.
Crossing her arms, her eyes narrowed on the floor, declining to meet mine.
"You refusing the truth will not change the truth, Siya. It will remain the truth itself and in that truth, you are mine and I am yours"
As soon as I completed, her gaze snapped right back into mine, glaring with baleful intensity.
"Then why is that girl there? If you are so much bounded with me then why the fuck did I witness that, huh?" She barked, the corner of her eyes tearing up. "I hate you. You think this is a joke? Few words of consolation will not repair what's already broken"
Her lips tremble as she tried to steady her breathes, leaning back on the wall for support.
"I didn't invite her here and I don't intend on having any relationship with her" I unclenched the fists on my sides, cupping her face to wipe the tears that spilled from her eyes.
For a moment, her body tensed at the contact. However, she quickly relaxed into my touch, leaning more without any protest.
Carefully, I rested my forehead against hers, watching her as she took uneven breathes with her eyes shut.
"I promise. I never ever thought of replacing you" The words felt tighter in my throat, leaving a bitter taste aftermath.
Just when I estimated that she has calmed down, a low chuckle escaped from her.
Re-opening her tear filled eyes, she passed me a tired look, a sad smile plastering on her lips.
"That is where you are wrong" I frowned at her words but she neglected it and continued.
"Thinking only won't be effective Rudransh, you need to act on it. The way you behave outside, it becomes obvious for people to know that you aren't deeply serious about this, about us. That itself provides them the encouragement to shatter the non-existent understanding we share"
She paused, letting her words sink in my mind. "Why else do you think that your sister got the idea of marrying you off with someone else?"
I opened my mouth to argue, to point out that she was absolutely wrong but nothing came up. Suddenly, I felt like the even the two millions words in the dictionary weren't enough to defend myself.
I heard her sigh slowly before releasing herself from my arms while I stood on the same spot, unable to do anything, the inability killing me every passing second.
Why am I feeling so vulnerable and suffocated all of a sudden?
"You shouldn't be here anymore" Her soft voice rang into my ears, the gentleness pricking me more than thousands of taunts could.
Within a second, she added quickly, "Don't keep them waiting for so long"
After that, a pin-drop silence fell into the room. Except for the noise of my own blood pumping in my veins, echoing in my head.
Then-"I am sorry"
My arms found their way to her waist, drawing her body towards mine.
I felt her freeze at the unexpected hug, her heartbeats now mingling with the rapid beats of mine.
My fingers digged further onto her sides, letting her nestle more. "I know a simple sorry can't undo the mistakes I've made.
Heaving a breathe out, I snuggled onto the crook of her neck, noticing the way her own breathe stopping.
"I'm also aware that you don't trust me fully and I-"
"I trust you" She cut me off in between, ushering the words quickly.
Shaking my head negatively, I broke the hug. "It's okay. You don't have to lie, atleast not to me"
"I'm not lying" She mumbled confidently. "I just don't trust myself, that is why I'm letting you go before it's too late"
"Too late?" I repeated, confused.
"I can't catch feelings for you knowing that they will never be reciprocated" Her eyes lowered again, the disappointed prominent in her voice.
Grasping her chin, I lifted it until our orbs collided. Her eyes full of despair and mine, too tangled.
Pressing my lips against her forehead, I stared back again. "You think I'm incapable of feeling for you?"
She nodded deliberately, reflecting the turmoil in her heart.
"Then you can't me more wrong about me" I confessed.
Her eyes widen at the remark, a tiny flicker of something close to hope painted on her face.
Detaching herself, she muttered in a low tone. "Don't give me false hope, Rudransh"
The way she casually spelled my name, it sparked something inside my heart. I could sense the ignition of these emotions that I've buried long time ago.
This time I cannot let go though, I will be the one for her. For her, I'll cross the line that has turned me into the man I am today.
I approached nearer before murmuring. "With you Siya, everything is real"
•••○○○•••
That was it for the chapter guys,
My exams are going on right now😁
It will be finished the day after tomorrow (on thursday) so till then, Adios!
Drop down your precious votes, it encourages to write more😊
Also do comment below your fav part from the chapter 💗
The burn has finally started now😉
Okay my lovelies, I'll be back with next update after the completion of my examination 🎀
Love, C.S ❤