As the weeks passed since the infamously awkward dinner with Rosé, Chris and his new lady love, Jennie, Lisa tried not to dwell on the events of the evening too much, though she did find her thoughts drifting every so often to the dark-haired woman and the gummy smile that was almost permanently in place by the end of the evening. She wished she could have talked one-on-one with Jennie once more before parting ways that night, but Jennie and Chris had left first, making some excuse about Jennie having an early therapy session the next morning. Rosé and Lisa had just turned and winked at one another knowingly. They both knew Chris wanted to get home and get the most out of what was left of his evening with his beautiful girlfriend while she was still relatively uninhibited from the wine. He wasn't fooling anyone. Shortly after Chris' departure, Rosé had said goodbye and ran off to snuggle in for the night with Jisoo, who had texted Rosé during dinner to let her know she would stay up until she got home. Not quite ready to go home to her quiet apartment, Lisa had made her way back to her favorite leather sofa and watched the remains of the fire glowing in the fireplace and reflected back on the evening's events. She felt oddly lonely in that moment. Not just alone, but truly lonely. It had been a couple of years since her last boyfriend and, though she hadn't really been interested in putting herself back out there, maybe tonight had changed her mind for her. She really did miss the companionship and the feeling of being physically close to someone. Lisa's strange brush with Jennie in the restroom earlier that evening had reminded her of what that closeness felt like.
Lisa was startled to see how close they were standing to one another, their sides lightly pressed together. Lisa found herself enjoying the warmth emanating from the woman in front of her. "You are..." she let out a slow breath"... beautiful. And wildly entertaining," Lisa finished, resting her hand softly on top of Jennie's which was back at work dabbing at her blouse like a nervous tic. Lisa's gesture caused her to still in her motions for a moment and she glanced between Lisa and the hand touching her own, making no move to pull it away.
But she didn't want to misplace that loneliness and need onto Jennie. Besides, she seriously doubted that Jennie felt anything at all in that moment. It was all so silly, really. She had chuckled softly to herself as she pried herself up off the couch to begin dreaded trudged through the snowy night, sans boots, back to the comfort of her apartment.
Swallowing her pride, Lisa had called Chris the next morning to apologize for her odd behavior and to assure him that she really did love his new girlfriend and couldn't wait to see more of her. Chris had sounded genuinely pleased by her words, and with an enthusiastic goodbye, promised to talk to her soon about something that he didn't have time to get into at the moment. With Chris' cryptic goodbye hanging over her head, she willed the days to go by just a bit faster until she had a chance to speak with him about it.
The day-to-day pictorials was wearing on Lisa. Don't get her wrong, she loves to be in front of the camera same as behind it but sometimes she just wanted to sleep the whole day. Doing nothing. As a particularly grueling week came to a close, she decided she needed to decompress a bit and immediately picked up the phone to see what Rosé and Jisoo were up to. Five minutes later, she had secured herself a date with the two women; she was even promised her favorite meal, some excellent conversation, and a movie - though they made no promise that any of them would be awake enough to make it to the end. When did we become such boring old fuddy duddies? Lisa wondered, chuckling to herself. The anticipation of an evening with friends was what got her through the remaining hours of her day. With a terse goodbye to Harry, her manager, she put her favorite plaid wool pea coat on in its place and headed out the door.
Rosé and Jisoo conveniently lived in the apartment building around the corner from Lisa's, so they saw each other relatively frequently, but that didn't mean she was any less excited about being invited over – or more accurately, inviting herself over - for the evening.
Lisa arrived at the couple's apartment around six after having stopped off at her place to change into a comfortable pair of jeans and her favorite hooded sweatshirt, tie her hair up in a loose ponytail and grab the case of beer she had put in the fridge to chill in preparation for tonight's get-together. She stood outside the couple's door anticipating the fun night ahead of them, but before Lisa knew what hit her, Jisoo had flung the door open and swept Lisa up in a ridiculous hug that physically forced her from the doorway all the way down the hall and into the main living area where she was unceremoniously dropped back to the floor.
"Oomph! And hello to you too, Chu! What's with the Super Hulk welcome there? Been eating your spinach, I see?" Lisa snickered while playfully squeezing Jisoo's puny little biceps.
Jisoo was, by far, the tiniest little Korean girl Lisa had ever met. She is 5 feet tall and 4 inches, and looked like she was a perpetual college student with her baby face and thin frame, something I'm sure she'd be thankful for a few decades from now.
After the initial shock of being manhandled by her crazy friend wore off, she proceeded through their usual formalities... shoes off, inquire about how everyone's day was, set the table for dinner, get everyone's drink orders, etc. They were a well-oiled machine until...
*knock knock*
Lisa paused, a la dear-in-the-headlights. "You expecting someone?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow and glancing back to Rosé and Jisoo who were puttering around in the kitchen.
"Oh yeah," Rosé said loudly from behind the door of the fridge. "Would you mind answering the door, Lisa? I'm trying to find something amongst all the leftover crap in this refrigerator and Jisoo has her hands buried in raw chicken."
"Sure, sure," Lisa muttered, still very confused by the sudden change in what she believed to be their usual night in. She must have taken a bit longer to answer the door than she had meant to because the knocking began again, but louder this time.
"One second," Lisa said to the mystery person on the other side of the door. As she pulled the chain away and swung the door open, she was shocked to see Jennie standing there, flowers in hand, looking even prettier - if that was even possible - than she had last week at the restaurant.
"Jennie!" Lisa squeaked, shoving her hands quickly into her back pockets and striking what she hoped was a relaxed pose.
Jennie smiled confidently and held her gaze. "Hello again, Lisa. It's so nice to see you. Mind if I come in? I want to get these flowers in some water," she asked casually, maintaining eye contact until Lisa suddenly came to her senses and stepped aside to let Jennie through the front door that she had so rudely been blocking.
"Of course, of course. Those flowers are lovely, thank you," Lisa said, sincerely. This earned her a raised eyebrow and half-smile from Jennie.
"Um, Lisa," Rosé said, nudging her friend playfully, "I'm pretty sure Jennie brought the flowers for us, you weirdo." Rosé chuckled lightly and accepted the flowers from Jennie, thanking her again for the lovely gift and went back to the kitchen.
Lisa, feeling impossibly more awkward as the seconds ticked on, decided to just give it up. She didn't know why she couldn't stop making an idiot of herself in front of this woman, so she decided to try a different tack. Going into actress-Lisa-mode, she stood up a bit straighter, took a breath and turned her attention on Jennie.
"It is so nice to see you again, too. Please, come in and make yourself comfortable," Lisa said as she ushered Jennie further into Rosé and Jisoo's home. "Oh, and there's a 'no shoe' policy, so if you want some slippers or something to wear, just let one of those two bums know. They'll hook you up."
After leaving her shoes at the door and politely declining the offer of slippers 'or something', Jennie began a slow walk around the couple's living room, checking out the decor and photographs spread strategically throughout the living space. Jennie noticed a lovely painting, somewhat impressionistic, of a woman gazing out a window. Lisa saw Jennie pause in front of the painting and walked up behind he quietly.
"What are you looking at?" Lisa asked in a soft, non-accusatory voice.
Jennie, not having realized Lisa was standing so close, backed up a bit at the sudden noise and ran herself right into the front of Lisa.
"Whoa whoa, didn't mean to scare you," Lisa chuckled, steadying Jennie from behind with a firm grip to her upper arms, noticing the slight height advantage she had in bare feet. She could feel more than hear Jennie take a deep breath and she immediately dropped her hands back to her sides so as not to make the brunette feel uncomfortable.
"I was admiring this painting. They have some beautiful pieces in their home. I love seeing what others are inspired or moved by. Perhaps that's the psychiatrist in me coming out. This piece, though... I really love this one. Do you know where they acquired it?"
"From me," Lisa responded.
"Oh! Did you find it at a gallery or street fair? I would love to see more of the artist's work. There's something about it... a feeling I get when I look at it..." Jennie trailed off, reaching her hand slowly toward the painting.
"I actually know the artist personally," Lisa stated, intentionally drawing the conversation out well past the point of necessity.
"You do?" Jennie said quickly, turning her head around to look at where she thought Lisa was standing. Little did she know that the blonde had remained directly behind her after their little run in a minute ago, so when her head swiveled around toward Lisa, she was startled by the pair of raven eyes looking back at here from mere inches away. But she didn't flinch or retreat, she held her ground, slowly shifting her gaze between Lisa's eyes and other parts of her face, seemingly taking it all in while she had the chance.
"Well, you're looking at her," Lisa breathed out, offering a shy smile.
"It's... you're... lovely," Jennie stuttered. "Your work!" she all but shouted, "...your work is lovely."
Lisa almost laughed out loud at how absurd this was. She was not someone who easily managed things that were out of the ordinary. She was far too cerebral of a person to handle it well, lacking the necessary social flexibility to accommodate the unexpected. But this time? This time felt different. She really wanted to try and accommodate, try to wrap her mind around this, because Jennie made her feel things that she hadn't felt in a long time - intrigued, curious, excited. Somewhere in the back of her mind, it occurred to her that this was Chris' girlfriend she was suddenly taking an interest in. And that twinge of guilt and embarrassment and fear of the unknown almost caused Lisa to back down. But as quickly as those doubts entered her mind, she pushed them away again. She didn't even know Jennie yet. Maybe this was just a passing infatuation. There was no point in stopping something that hadn't even started. As Lisa stood, lost in the thoughts bouncing around in her over-worked brain, Jennie just waited silently, her gaze soft, expectant… almost…
Lisa was pulled from her thoughts by the sound of Jisoo clearing her throat loudly from her position at the table. Lisa chanced a glance at her and was met by a not-so-subtle glare and a flick of her finger indicating she would like to have a word with Lisa, now. Leaving Jennie to continue her exploration of the living room, she joined Jisoo over at the table.
"What are you doing?" hissed Jisoo, grabbing her a bit roughly by the upper arm and dragging her into the seat next to her.
Lisa had the good graces to look adequately chastised and sat rubbing her arm for a moment while Jisoo waited for Rosé to join them. Once the three had assembled, Jisoo leaned forward and, in a measured tone, asked Lisa what it was that she had just interrupted over there by her painting. Rosé's eyes got wide and she looked intently at Lisa, waiting to hear what she had to say for herself.
"Nothing, guys!" Lisa declared a bit too loudly, drawing a glance from Jennie who had moved on to look at some old photographs of Rosé's family. "Nothing," she said more softly. "I had surprised her a second ago while she was distracted by the painting and she stumbled back into me. We just... I was steadying her. She hadn't had the chance to move away yet, that's all," she finished, looking down at her hands clasped in her lap.
"O - K..." Rosé drew out. "Clearly I'm missing something here, so help me out," she finished, looking at Jisoo for clarification.
"Mmmm. I guess I was wrong," Jisoo gave in quickly. "You're right, I must have looked over at a weird time, sorry about that."
But Lisa saw the look Jisoo was giving her. They had known each other for years at this point and she saw disapproval shining brightly in her eyes. Jisoo knew exactly what she had interrupted and Lisa got the message loud and clear - just cool it. With a sigh, Lisa got up from the table and excused herself to go splash some really cold water on her face and try to get a hold of all of the feelings flying around inside of her making her act perhaps more boldly than she should. Calm, collected, confident Lisa Manoban was back in place. She could do this - she could make it through an evening with her friends and Jennie without doing something she'd regret later.
The future that we hold is so unclear
But I'm not alive until you call
And I'll bet the odds against it all
Save your advice 'cause I won't hear
You might be right but I don't care
There's a million reasons why I should give you up
But the heart wants what it wants
The heart wants what it wants...
*
A/N:
I love angst and i love JenLisa...please bare with me. 😊