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I spy the sun I spy a boy with blue eyes and black hair I spy someone who may never spy me I spy the rest of my life. TWs: mentions of Self harm and suicide [[COMPLETE]]

Dan has been missing for 2 years and Phil is slowly going crazy without him. When Dan finally returns home bruised, hurt, and broken they both realise they cant live without each other for long. Back from the kidnapping Dan suffers from depression and is struggling to live with the constant horrifying memories that haunt his life. Phil tries his hardest to help but will it be enough to save them both? trigger warning: contains self-harm and depressing thoughts. DO NOT READ if you are likely to get hurt by these things. I do not promote self harm or anything like this and I really hope that if you do these things talk to people about it. please. Anyways hope you enjoy my first phanfiction. I apologise if its bad but just a heads up if you hate it :) x

Daniel Howell and Phil Lester have gone through a lot together. ***TRIGGER WARNING- SELF HARM / SUICIDE ATTEMPTS / DEPRESSION / HOMOSEXUALITY /SAD/ANGST***

Dan has given up on ever being happy. Life has lost its meaning, and everything he seems to do causes some form of destruction, and Dan is so tired of destroying the things he used to love. He's lost so much, and he's scared of losing Phil, the only thing he can bring himself to care about. But Dan can't see past his own depression that Phil is struggling with bulimia, and that he's equally good at hiding his dark thoughts as Dan. And as Dan walks through the streets alone at night getting high to escape from the hell he's trapped himself in, will he be able to see that maybe the happiness he craves so desperately is not on the streets in the form of white pills, but inside his own apartment in the form of Phil Lester? Or will it be too late... WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE, SEXUAL SITUATIONS, USE OF DRUGS, VIOLENCE, HIGH LEVELS OF ANGST, BULIMIA, AND THEMES OF SUICIDE. IT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR YOUNGER READERS.

Dan hated his life and that wasn't even an understatement. Each day he wished he had never woken up as he was tormented by those who were meant to love him. Just because they were meant to love him doesn't mean they did. He was suffering and was so close to giving up. Then he met Phil. Phil changed everything. TW: Abuse (both physical and emotional), depression, self harm, kind of a suicide attempt although the person doesn't get very far with it, Dan's kind of mute COVER CREDIT TO @DOODLE5SOS

"The less you care, the happier you are." He turned to face me, his blue eyes dull with traces of betrayal. "No. The less you care, the lonelier you are." - In a world where people have the ability to flip an emotions switch, many people lack feelings and sympathy in general- including Dan Howell after a tragedy strikes and he can't take it. However, he meets Phil Lester, the outgoing flirt with too big of a heart to handle. The two become close, and Dan soon realizes that even with his switch off, he can't deny that Phil is slowly reaching to turn it back on, and Dan can't seem to push his hand away.

What happens when the Phandom takes things too far? TW: Self-harm, suicide, depression A/N: Each chapter will be short as it was originally going to be a one-shot but decided to go further with it

You're favourite youtube stars, Dan and Phil, meet each other and decide to move in. Along the way is romance, tears and heartbreak. *NOTICE* Trigger Warning. If you struggle with anxiety, self harm or depression, please read with caution as your safety is more important than reads.

Dan is highly depressed and falls for Phil, his best friend who tries to help him out of his self destructive path. Trigger warning -mention of self harm, death, eating disorders, alcoholism. Some personal views about these issues are expressed so I'm sorry if you don't agree with them but hey that's why I said "personal".