Him (Newt x Reader)

Chapter 9: "Right?"

"I'm sorry!" I slap my hand to my forehead and scrunch my nose with closed eyes, "I didn't mean for it to come off like that!" I pause and sigh. "Newt, you are one of the only people here that I trust and I am willing to explain everything that happened with the griever. But I need to know that you will keep this a secret, and if I can actually trust you."

He seems taken aback by my mini rant at first, letting the words flow through his brain again before lightly smiling and gently taking my hand in his. "You can always trust me." I smile at his reassurance and gently squeeze his hand, "I'm listening." He promises, and this is all I needed.

"Seconds before the griever struck, I started to hear this voice. A female voice, who kept saying this word over and over again, claiming that it would save me from the griever. I was already scared and didn't know what to do, so I ignored it."

Newt continues to hold my hand, continuing to listen.

"But then, the stinger came flying down at me and I had no other choice. I finally screamed that word, not even knowing what it meant, just knowing that this voice and what she was telling me was my last hope. I closed my eyes and the next thing I know is that it's dead." I take a breath, "I don't know how it happened or who that woman is, but all I know is that she saved me."

Once again, he doesn't speak at first. His hand remains with mine as he stares into the horizon, seeming to sit on my story for a minute. I watch him closely, terrified of the possibility that his thoughts on me actually changed and maybe he does believe I worked for WICKED. But I won't ever know by just staring at him, I need him to say something.

I study him for another few seconds until his eyes finally come back to mine, he lets go of my hand and shifts his body to where he's directly facing me, I follow the same out of respect. Without speaking, he takes both of my hands into his and holds them ever so strongly.

"Anything is possible, Y/n. I want you to keep that in mind." He begins, "Like you said before, we are all on the same team. It doesn't matter who you were before the Glade, although I bet that version of you is still bloody amazing, it matters who you are now and the choices you make now. Whether or not you worked for WICKED, you have proven that you are more than dedicated on helping all of us and yourself escape, you don't wanna be here and neither do the rest of us. That is more than enough for us, and especially me, to know that we can trust you."

Our eyes lock to each other as we study the other's face, I'm not exactly sure how he's feeling but I know that a million emotions are swirling in my head. "Really?" I ask in a smiling, hopeful tone. "Yes, Y/n." He smiles back, and we laugh to each other before I say, "Thank you, Newt."

He slightly tilts his head, "Thank you?" His accent peaks, "For what?" Either Newt isn't as smart as I thought or he's just messing with me. "For everything!" I exclaim, "Helping me around the Glade, treating me so nicely, being here for me all the time and especially coming up here! I know you just wanted to check on me, but it really means a lot to me that you actually did." Taking a breath, I adore his eyes, "Thank you, Newt."

Newt suddenly wraps his arms around me and pulls me against his warm body. I'm shocked to say the least and my strange feelings for him are not helping the situation. But I still return the gesture and hold onto him even tighter, fully welcoming the embrace.  "I'll always be here for you, Y/n." He pauses, "And everyone else, of course."

A sudden thought flies to my mind, sending a wave of anxiety through my body. I've only known Newt for a few days, I'm not really keeping track but I do believe that what I feel for him is true insanity. It feels like I've known Newt for years now, maybe forever, all I know is that I feel so safe and comfortable with him, and I never want him to leave my side. Perhaps the possibility of knowing him before the Glade is more valid than I thought, because maybe that's why I've considered my thoughts and feelings to be more than just friends with him. Every part of me is desperate to know how he feels, and no matter the outcome, this might be my last chance.

"Newt, how do you feel about me?" I bluntly ask.

"W-What?" He stutters, shocked.

"How do you feel about me?" I ask again.

This time, he visibly relaxes and lets out a breath, "Right."

"Right?" I inquire.

"Y/n, this is going to sound so absurd, but I feel like I've known you forever. Anytime I'm with you or just even near you, it feels right. This sounds crazy saying it out loud, but it's the truth. Ever since that day you came up in the box, it feels like I've known you a whole lifetime. I'm scared to admit it, but sometimes I get the urge to treat you as if we are more than what we are now; to treat you as more than a friend as if I've always been that way with you. I know that this doesn't make sense but it is truthfully how I feel, I've always felt right with you, Y/n."

He lets out a hard breath, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ramble, I just started talking and-"

"Are you serious?" I breath with a smile.

He seems to freeze as he realizes that I'm smiling, happy with his confession. "Y/n, how could I lie about something like this? It's you." Our wide smiles appear again as we pull each other in for another hug, welcoming each other's embrace with more comfort and safety than ever before. "You're not crazy, Newt." I whisper to him, "And if you fully believe that you are, then we can be crazy together. I feel the same way about you, like I've known you for years and it just feels right to be with you as more than friends. I know how you feel. Believe me." 

He holds me tighter and buries his face into the side of my neck, showing that my own confession has reassured him and made him more than happy. We stay together like this for a bit longer until the rising sound of yelling and shouting comes from afar in the Glade. We break from our hug and look to each other, confirming that we hear the same thing.

"Where is that coming from?" I ask while standing up and scanning the Glade. Newt stands up as well and scans the Glade for himself, "I think it's coming from the Council Hall." We both rush down the tower and make our way to the Hall, the screaming and yelling becoming much more evident with each step we take.

We rush inside the broken building to see Gally and Minho screaming at the top of their lungs to each other, the rest of the boys arguing as well. I honestly think it's funny that they still use this place after the grievers destroyed it. I quickly glance around and become relieved to not find Thomas, Teresa, nor Chuck. I'd rather them not be here in the middle of this.

"What the bloody hell is going on in here?!" Newt storms, stopping everyone mid-shout. "This shank!" Minho says while raising his arm to Gally, "Is trying to take over!"

"Take over?" Newt questions while crossing his arms. "Yeah, what else do you expect me to do? Gally defends himself, "Thomas arrives and he starts breaking all the rules, starts to cause havoc anywhere he goes! Next, Y/n and Teresa just add onto it and everything really starts to go downhill. Have you even looked around, Newt? Our Glade is destroyed! Half the people we've been stuck here with are dead!" Gally stops himself and takes a quick breath, seeming to collect his thoughts before losing control.

"I'm tired of losing people, Newt." He admits, "I'm tired of everyone losing their lives to the maze and those damn grievers. We don't belong out there, Newt. We belong in here, in the Glade."

"No, we don't Gally." I intervene without even thinking, "You have been trapped here for a lot longer than I have, but I know that this is not your home. Whatever is beyond that maze is where we belong, our homes are out there Gally, not here." I pause, "Please."

Gally looks to the ground, contemplating his thoughts and giving me hope that maybe he's changing sides, maybe he understands and finally wants to leave. "I'm sorry, Y/n." I should've known better, "I really am, but you've left me no choice."

My body freezes at Gally's words as I hear the door open from behind me, it's too late. A sudden, hard object strikes the back of my head and I fall to the floor, succumbing to the overwhelming pain and excruciating headache. I can't help but close my eyes, drifting away from the Glade.