Chances | Dazai X Reader

"For everything."

• • •

You wake up with the familiar weight of Dazai's arm on your side. You shift over to face him, his eyes are still closed as you examine his face. God this man is pretty without even trying. The bandages on his arms aren't anything new, you've gotten used to them. There wasn't a need to question them either after one talk you had with Chuuya.

• • •

"What about Dazai?" You ask him, curious as to why Chuuya called you over for a specific reason. "He's just..." Chuuya himself isn't very sure how to explain it, but he's trying. "He seems better ever since you've joined. Lighter, even more carefree, I don't know how to explain it, but I'm glad he is." And Chuuya is glad to see Dazai both look and feel better—even if he knows that Dazai's hiding so much—he likes seeing Dazai act the way he does now.

And deep inside, he wishes that he was able to give him that before you could.

Because he doesn't understand how or why he feels like the two of them can understand each other so much. Maybe it's partly because of the fact that Chuuya doesn't think he's human and Dazai...he doesn't feel human anymore.

Trying to go on with his life with a mindset as 'I need to get through this day' repeatedly. It's tiring. But he wouldn't say that he's fully recovered from such a mindset—he's definitely trying.

As he's said before—to Chuuya—maybe it's worth trying.

• • •

His eyes flutter open, meeting your gaze, "Enjoying the view?" You laugh quietly in response, "Most definitely." He stretches his body out, pushing himself so he can lean his back onto the headboard. "You know I was awake the whole time right? I was only resting my eyes." You move upwards with him, leaning back onto the arm that is now pressed behind your back, "You're so annoying."

He stares at the wall in front of him, getting lost into his own thoughts once again.

"Dazai?" He snaps out of it. "You okay?" Dazai nods at you, "Just...thinking about stuff."

You turn to look directly at him, giving him a reassuring look, "Do you want to talk?"

"I was just thinking about last night, nothing major, but—" He gulps because he really doesn't want to say or face this. "I just...I really don't want you to feel like you were forced into any of this—" Because he thinks that it was just an in the moment decision that you may have made—he's really hoping it wasn't and that it's genuine—that you still want to be with him.

"Are you talking about us? Cause if you are, I need you to understand that I made that decision because I thought it was right, and I don't regret it at all," you respond, bringing your hand up to hold onto his cheek. He holds onto the hand that's resting on his cheek, keeping it there, "I don't wanna weigh you down or anything like that."

"You're not, I want to be there for you—" You start, still looking into the uncovered eye of his. "I want to be with you." He smiles at your response, "So do I." You bring him closer to you, pressing a soft kiss onto his lips. "Now, we need to get up." He whines, "It's Saturday!" You scoff at him, "Yeah well, it doesn't look like you're gonna sleep again, and we both need to brush our teeth and shower." And then, Dazai starts smirking at you, the same way he did when he suggested taking a sho—

"You're awfully bold," you immediately say. "Always am, always will be," Dazai responds, bowing his head down dramatically as he stays seated while you get up from the bed.

"Get up."

• • •

Once both you and Dazai are ready, you decide to go to Chuuya's room. Opening the door, your eyes immediately land on Chuuya, who's not alone. He's talking to Tachihara, and they both seem to be smiling, getting along. Chuuya's already dressed, so you could only assume that he was going to Dazai's room before he ran into Tachihara, but it's just an assumption. Then, Tachihara turns around when he hears the sound of a door closing, and he sees the two of you. Mentally noting that you and Dazai just came out the room together—not that it matters a whole lot. But hey, Tachihara thought you were pretty, not necessarily trying to make a move of anything.

Tachihara himself? Not too sure about his own sexuality, he couldn't really experiment much before either, but the Mafia is—obviously—filled with tons of people, different people. Not that Tachihara came here for anything like that, but it's always a nice...experience.

Chuuya looks to where Tachihara turned towards and he waves at you two, "Hey, [Y/N]." You wave back at him, meanwhile, Dazai rolls his eyes. Tachihara's eyes stay at Dazai as he watches you two walk up to them. "Hey," he says, somewhat glad to finally be able to talk to you all properly. He's already become sort of close with Chuuya, and they've already decided to hang out so—

Whatever that is, it's going well. Yeah, sure, Chuuya thinks Tachihara's pretty, but it doesn't mean anything major. He thinks loads of people are pretty. Technically, he believes that everyone is amazing, but he's not gonna go up to a grown man and tell them 'Hey, you're really pretty'.

No.

And it's not like Chuuya's some stereotypical, cliche, little flower that can't do shit for themselves. It's stupid most of the time. He knows how to deal with people. Really, this man has a literal God inside him, he has power, and he has confidence—

With that, he—sadly—is a very big tsundere most of the time.

He wouldn't admit that, he'd probably make up a random insult to cover up that fact. You know, like he'd normally do with Dazai, before everything.

"Hey." Both you and Dazai say at the same time, as if something like this was planned. Well, Dazai had a feeling something was going to stop you two from going to Chuuya's room...and that something just happened to be Tachihara. He gets it, Tachihara's a good person from what he knows, but he also probably has a bunch of secrets that he'd never tell anyone.

"Tachihara and I were gonna hang out today, if that's cool with you guys?" Chuuya says, saying it as if he needed permission to hang out with somebody other than you and Dazai. "Yeah, that's cool," Dazai says, looking at Chuuya in a way that only he would understand. "We'll...talk about things later, yeah?" Chuuya says, because he figured that Dazai wanted to talk about that night with him. Set boundaries and settle things down between them.

They both feel the unnaturalness—they didn't even call each other names—and it's something they need to talk about.

"Bye," Chuuya says, and you both say it back to him, waving as you watch him and Tachihara leave. "So it's just us now," you say, wondering what to do now since it's probably the first time something like this has happened. "We can always go back to bed," Dazai suggests, grinning playfully. "Oh, come on, when's the last time we got to hang out alone?" You ask, hoping that Dazai doesn't say anything stupid.

"We're literally alone every time you sleep over—" Dazai says, laughing a little at your reaction. "I meant outside. Come on, it could be like a date, we're not getting a mission anytime soon so let's enjoy it while it lasts." He smiles at the offer.

"A date it is."

A/N: Can y'all tell that this is just me trying to come up with random shit until the major chapters? Also I can't believe that I've managed to write thirty chapters??