Hide from 'Falling' || H.S

Chapter 67 - Ashley | Reveal

Probably my provocation caused him to act that way, but I loved it and it was exactly what I had needed. The way the tears streamed down my face because of the pressure along with the fact that I had trouble breathing only intensified the feeling.

It had just been insane and I regret nothing.

"I don't know." he replied, sounding like he was drunk from sleeping. According to the brightness in his room, however, I guessed that the sun was shining through his windows. It's probably later in the morning.

Harry's bed was comfortable and every time I lie next to him I automatically sleep better. I really don't know what that was about...he just gives me an inner security that I never felt before and that's why it's easier for me to relax next to him.

I think because of him I no longer fear the next morning before it even starts, but just venture into the day. It is a liberating feeling.

I tried to move my upper body to look at the clock, but I couldn't. Fuck. The memories of last night started to come back completely and it seemed like I was hungover, I felt dizzy.

The whole thing was just so fucking intense that it was enough to intoxicate us...we allowed our bodies to take control and go after what we craved, I felt so fucking alive and free.

Now, however, my brain was starting to function again.

Harry is just as dangerous as before even more now, because in his presence I lose control and I do things I better regret...but I don't. I never did to be honest and that is what scares me the most.

Fear. I know he feels it too and that reassures me. It makes me feel better and maybe I should start admitting to myself how similar we actually are...but an inner voice is holding me back to fully expect that fact.

Because he also makes me incredibly angry, his actions and words had hurt me and sometimes I really think that we can do nothing but argue with each other.

I wanted to tell him how mad he makes me and that I want distance from him, because my life is the definition of chaos since he is in it. But he was addictive and he was right, I can't get enough. Never.

He had this certain effect on me no one before him had, I just had to kiss him, touch him somewhere to just feel something again. That's why I came to his room. He is the only one who really makes me feel something strong enough to make my heart race, to skip a beat.

Harry Styles is making my heart race, who would have ever thought that? But it was true. And I've had enough of suppressing and hiding this feeling, because what good does it do me? Nothing.

That kind of thrill was what I was going for when I joined the CIA and hunted down and killed the people I had to. But with him it was much more enjoyable and pleasant.

The last days without being near him and constantly feeling this strange atmosphere between us was just suffcoating. That's why last night was like a much needed break. We both needed this.

It was so fucking dangerous and chaotic.

But I am just too tired to overthink right now. Or ever again.

"I have to pee." I whispered, opening my eyes and looking sideways at him.

His hair was a mess, he had some marks from the pillow on his cheeks and they were slightly flushed. It was very cute. His green eyes were so beautiful and I could look into them for hours....