Just an experiment.. | ronarry/rarry

Cw: kind of sexual things that might make you uncomfortable (not smut)

I finally have Ron back!! Maybe not in the way I wanted but I have him back.

Sure, him being with Lavender is annoying. The word Won-Won is annoying. But I cope, I might start calling Ron Won-Won just to piss him off.

Sometimes I feel like Ron isn't very happy with Lavender. Hermione thinks he's happy but I know him, he's my best mate.

Hermione thinks I'm "jealous" and "in love with Ron". I'm not. He's my best mate, nothing more. Trust me, I would know if I liked him.

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My eyes open halfway and my ears are filled with the sound of a laugh, a high pitched, giggly, screechy laugh. Lavender.

I get that we are teenagers and "full of hormones" but why the fuck are they so horny? Every night well most nights, sometimes they get caught. They do "it". I wish I didn't share a room with Ron, I mean it was fine before when we were like you know but now it's just you know. (A/N: they are 16-17 in this so this is legal)

I know this sounds weird and all but hearing them kind of turns me on ig? I don't knoe how to explain it, it makes me feel like horny. But I mean it's sex, it would turn anyone on.

Hearing Ron just reminds me of when me and him used to you know.. do "it".

Sometimes I jerk off to the noise of them, I feel like such a perv while I do it though.

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Whenever I'm without Ron or when he's making out or something with Lavender, I feel like I have a big empty pit in my stomach.

I feel like Ron is the only one I can talk to about stuff, god I'm so clingy. Why is Ron friends with me?

Sometimes when I get anxious or I overthink I scratch my arm until it starts to bleed, it doesn't hurt. I just like to see the blood.

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I look up from the common room and see a half asleep Ron walking towards me, I sighed. This will be fun!! (Sarcasm if you couldn't tell).

"Hey uhm Harry, sorry about last night with me and Lav. She just came in the room and she was heh- really persuasive" Ron said not meeting my eyes.

"Uhm yeah no it's uhm cool..." I said looking down.

"Mate, you sure?" Ron asked kind of looking concerned.

I know I had jerked off to the noise last night, I needed something to get me off though. I feel gross and guilty and all of those emotions.

"Mhmmm" I said not bothering to open my mouth, I know I would end up saying the wrong thing.