I was laying in bed in a big black hoodie, covered head to toe in fluffy blankets and pillows, my eyes extremely red and puffy from crying for hours on end until my head hurt which it still did. It is now four in the afternoon, I haven't eaten or gotten out of bed since we got home last night. I don't really remember much past the part where I sat down in the rain and cried, but Tommy told me that they all brought me home once I passed out.
"I'm really worried about you, Y/n." He comments, sitting down on the end of my bed. When I didn't reply he continued talking. "I know you don't want to tell me what happened, but I think it would be best for you to join us out for the day!" He says with a smile, poking my foot he was sitting by.
"I'm good." I say, tucking my legs up to my chest, digging myself deeper into the blankets."Oh come on, everyone is going to be there! It would be good for you to get some kind of human contact that isn't just me and Tommy." He explains, looking at me with a worried expression, tilting his head slightly.
If everyone is going to be there then that means Sapnap will be there as well- and he told me to not talk to him, so I have been trying to keep my distance. Even though I keep getting a painful erg to text or call him.
That's when I remember what I was doing days earlier. When I was playing that tune and talking to myself. It helped boost my mood a lot, playing the instrument I'm passionate about while talking about the person I love-"I think I'll just stay here." I tell him, my voice muffled by me shoving a pillow in my face. He lets out a long sigh in defeat, getting up from his spot on the end of my bed.
"Can you at least get out of your room when we're gone?" He asks, sounding disappointed that he didn't successfully get me to actually come along."Ok..." I agree out of pity, pulling the pillow off my face, not enjoying seeing him like this all because of me.
"Thank you, we are leaving right away so text me whenever if you need me." He tells me with a warm smile, making me give a small weak smile back. He exits my room, closing the door softly behind him.I roll back over immediately being drowned in my own thoughts.
I should just play my guitar to get my mind off of things. I tell myself, as I slowly flip the many blankets off of me. I step out of bed, no longer feeling the warmth of all my blankets on my bare legs from wearing shorts. As I walk out my door I hear the front door close, meaning they have left.I walk down the stairs and make my way to the basement, seeing my guitar peacefully sitting on its stand. I smile at the sight of my beloved instrument that I haven't played for almost a whole day.
I carefully grab it and sit down on the couch in the basement.Moments later I start playing, while talking once again. This time I tried something a bit different. I sang my words. Quietly, but it was a start. I have a bit of a voice, it's not that good- but I have one.
As I was singing and playing I realized I have to tell Sapnap how I feel at some point. Even if he never wants to talk to me again I feel like he deserves to know. I can't just keep all these feelings bottled up inside of me. But how? That's the question. How should I tell him. It would be pretty boring just to full on tell him, that would just lead to an extremely awkward conversation. Especially if he doesn't feel the same way.
I can write him a note?
But I want to tell him myself, I person!
I can play him a song on my guitar?
No, he won't get it without words-
He doesn't really hear music like I do, it has to be verbally for him to actually get it... That's it! "A song!" I yell out loud to myself.Who am I kidding! I cant sing in front of a crowd! Especially if front of him, of all people!
That would be to embarrassing-
What if I get Wilbur to do it?
No, that would be weird. Wilbur singing a song to Sapnap about how I feel. I want to tell him myself. I guess that means I have to toughen up and sing. I mean what's the worst that could happen?He doesn't feel the same.
You mess up.
You don't actually sound as good as you think.
He doesn't like the song, or he doesn't get it's for him.
Ok, that's enough. I break out of the battle in my head to make my final decision. "I'm going to write him a song!" I exclaim to myself, standing up in excitement while still holding onto my guitar so it won't fall. I mean, I already have the melody! All I have to do is write the lyrics and the parts for the others because I am DEFINITELY not doing this alone, and I know for sure that they will not hesitate to help me.Time skip: a couple hours later ;]
"Y/n! We are home!" I hear Tubbo yell from downstairs. I was in a better mood then before now, so I happily replied. "Up here!" I yell from my room. I am sitting on my bed with my guitar in my lap and a lined, coiled notebook in front of me. Ever since I thought of the idea I have been working on the song; writing down lyrics, thinking how I can match up the other instruments to go well with the melody I already have. A lot of trial and error, but now I'm finally almost done. Just a couple more versus!
I hear Tubbo run up the stairs, swinging my door open with a smile. "Whatcha doing?" He asks, happy to see me doing something besides just laying in bed. " I have finally thought of a way to tell him!" I exclaim excitedly, looking up at him with a smile. He plops down on my bed to get a closer look. "Who, Sapnap?" He asks grabbing the notebook to read what I have already written.
"Oh my! Y/n, this is amazing! How did you come up with this?!" He asks in astonishment, after reading my words over. "All I really did was just play a tune I liked on my guitar and talked to myself..." I explain. "Mostly about my feelings for Sapnap." I add quietly, feeling my face turn red as I tell him this. "That's so cute!" He complements, leaning forward to give me a big hug.
"I hope he thinks so too." I say.
"But! I going to need your guys help actually!" I exclaim right after, not giving him a chance to reply to my last words."Of course! What do you need?" He asks, looking ready to do anything to help.
"Ok, so..."
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Words 1963AHH IM SORRY TO LEAVE YOU HANGING! THIS WAS A PERFECT CHANCE!
I'm also doing this as a coping mechanism because I have school in 10 hours! And I recently found out I have a homophobe in my class... so yeah-
ANYWAYS!MAKE SURE TO STAY HYDRATED YOU BEAUTIFUL, VALID HUMAN!! <3

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~?Still Into You?~ (SapnapxReader)
FanfictionBAND AU! :3 Sapnap goes to England with Dream and George to visit an old friend of George. Little did Sapnap know he would reunite with his childhood best friend, yet this time it's different.... Y/n will be going by she/her pronouns, but you can c...
>Missing You<
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