You're Not Alone | Carlos Pena

"AGH!" I yelled, throwing a pillow at the TV. I have been watching chick flicks all day, writing a song in the process also. It was the day after Carlos ended us. I tried calling, texting, talking to him, but none of it worked. He just ignored me, just like I was ignoring Kendall. I have watched The Notebook, The Last Song, and I was now watching Titanic.

"STUPID ROSE! WHY DID YOU JUMP!? HE'S JUST GONNA TEAR YOUR HEART APART!" I yelled at the TV. I found it funny since my name, shortened, is Rose, so I felt like the one on TV. So oddly I was some-what talking to myself.  I shoved another spoon of ice cream into my mouth as more tears streaked my cheeks. I was so going to pay for eating 3 buckets of ice cream.

Guess I was somewhat beating my anorexia. But I knew what would happen. I would be so depressed I would stop eating and go back to being anorexic. I sighed and set down the ice cream. I pulled out my phone and texted James.

To: James

You still at the hospital?

I waited a few minutes until my phone dinged.

From: James

Yeah. Logan's doing fine. How about you?..Mo told me what happened.

To: James

Could be better. Let me know if anything happens with Logie.

I sent the last message and sighed.  I should be with Logan at the hospital, not sulking about a break up. That's a teenagers life for ya. I was starting to watch the movie again when my phone rang. It was Monica. "Hey girl! How you doing?" She asked. I sighed,  thankful to have someone who cares.

"Could be better." I said simply. "I was wondering if you were up to seeing Logan? I'm gonna meet James there in about 10 minutes so maybe we could head over together? Talk, you know." She said. She wanted me to tell her what happened. I told her Carlos and I broke it off, but not why. It was too painful.

Too much heart break. Ugh that sounded too cliche. "Sure. See you in 10." I said and hung up. I got up and walked into the bathroom  and washed off my face. I brushed my teeth to get out the ice cream taste.

I looked at my shaken figure in the mirror. My eyes were red and puffy, my cheeks streaked with wet and dry tears. My hair was a rats nest and my clothes were tear and ice cream stained, and wrinkled. My legs were so fat and my stomach not skinny enough. Gosh, why am I so ugly!?

No wonder Ian beat me. No wonder Kendall broke my heart. No wonder they made the bet. Now wonder all those Rushers hated on me when I date Kendall. Carlos and I never went public. The one that hurt me the most though was one I tried to ignore. No wonder Carlos hated me. I groaned. My life is screwed up.

The one I love hates me. Hates everything about me. Hates me for being force to kiss Kendall. Hates me for being ugly. Hates my for being not skinny. Hates me for being me. Everyone hated me and no one cared. Maybe I didn't need to be here. Just a person taking up space. Before I knew it I had a razor in my hand.

No that wouldn't do it. I ran into the kitchen and also grabbed a knife. I'd start off slow, torturing myself, and then bring on the pain and end it all. Everything. Who knows? Maybe I'd see Logan there. I took the razor and soon blood dropped from my wrist to the floor. No matter how much I hate blood, I would deal with this. I would go threw with it. When my arms were shaking from pain I grabbed the knife. This was it.

"Goodbye." I whispered to myself as the knife was positioned over my side.

Carlos' POV

I'm doing to do it. I'm going to see Rosalie. I opened my apartment and walked to the door of 2K. I raised my hand to knock when a door opened to my left. I turned and saw Monica. She looked shocked. "Oh, hi Carlos. What are you doing?" She asked surprised, blinking. "Oh hi Mo, um- er I was going to see Rose." I said looking at my feet. The carpet was suddenly interesting.

"I thought-" she began. "I'm apologizing. I miss her like crazy." I admitted, turning a bit red but Monica just beamed. "Oh okay! I was coming to get her. We're going to go see Logan." She said, pulling out the key to Rosalie's apartment. I raised an eyebrow. "She gave me the spare." She said and I nodded.

She went to open the door before I heard a blood curdling scream come from the other side of the door. Both of our eyes widened as she swung the door open. I ran in to see the one I loved, in the middle of the floor, a knife in her side, her hand holding it, cuts on her stomach and up and down her arms, in a pool of blood.

OMGGGGGGGGG I posted cuz @rusher4life0815's pic on Instagram reached 100 likes! But anywayssssss 2 comments and 1 vote for me to post the next chapter! lol i'm being evil! So yeah, 1 vote and 2 comments for the next chapter!!! xx