Mr Player//BTS FF

Chapter 84

And this was also the fact that had killed him a little more inside because he now saw himself unworthy to have what his heart still longed for. He saw himself as unworthy of love because he does not know how to love. He saw himself as the worst person in the world because he helped hurt the one he was supposed to love.

"Jungkook, please don't do this. I don't want to blame you or anyone. We're all to blame, we all contributed to this situation." Seon lowered herself to his eye level and grabbed his hands as she spoke to him, pulling him to stand up as she didn't want to see him like this.

She had thought a lot these days and the truth is that she knew very well that there were no good guys and bad guys in this story. It was just a mess, born of feelings of love and selfishness that had led to creating a situation full of pain and regret.

Nevertheless, she understood that everything happened for a reason because without all these events, she would never have known the truth and obviously, Jungkook would not have realized the true nature of his so-called love.

"I disappointed you."

"But so did I." She answered him as she looked into his tear-filled eyes.

"I hurt you"

"But you also got hurt."

"I lost you forever." His face tilted to the side as he let those words escape his lips, his gaze mirroring as slight hope for her to deny his claim. 

But unfortunately, Seon remained silent, causing his heart to plunge into a sea of ​​sadness.

"Tell me Seon...Didn't you ever love me?.. Was it all a lie or were there moments when your heart beat for me?" His question caught Seon off guard but now she knew the answer to this question because she had asked it herself many times.

"Of course I loved you and I still love you. I care about you but that love is not the same anymore." Her words inadvertently brought some hope into him and his face lit up, making it evident.

"That means if we try, we can get back to that love, right? I'll do anything, we'll try—"

"Jungkook. I don't think that's going to happen. I mean... My feelings can't be turned back now because... I'm in love with someone else." Seon cut him off, letting him hear something she knew that he wouldn't like it but she had to say it. At that moment when she found herself more empty of emotion and freer of fear than ever, she had to say it.

"You can un-love him. Like you un-loved me. Just let me try. I promise I can get him off your mind." He showed persistence and she just looked at him, not understanding how such a thing was possible, considering this was what she had been trying to do for years to no avail. Even when she had no memory of Jimin, she now knew that she had still found him dominating her dreams and her heart.

"How are you going to do that?" She asked him and Jungkook fell silent for a few minutes before he approached her and captured her lips, softly and tenderly.

Seon did not resist, she let him make his effort and she closed her eyes, making her own effort as well. As Jungkook's lips left hers and moved down her neck, his hands travelling up her body and bringing their bodies closer, Seon wrapped her arms around him like she once did. There existed a past when those lips would make her feel filled with lust and longing for him while now they filled her only with sadness and the will to cry.

She kept her eyes closed and focused on Jungkook's touch, his fingers travelling the skin beneath her blouse. His lips had come down to just above her chest, and the sound of his breaths seemed stressful to her. She paid attention to every detail but everything, everything just made her feel uncomfortable like she wanted those hands away from her body, and to erase the fact that those lips ever touched her. It was a feeling so deep that she never thought she would feel with someone like Jungkook who was her husband.

But unfortunately, all of her feelings were not visible on the surface, and Jimin's eyes, who had come at an obviously inappropriate time, the scene had him feel as if he was at a funeral. A funeral for his hopes that died, a funeral for his heart that was heartlessly stabbed to death. A funeral for his love that had no future.

His eyes could not look away, even though the scene had torn his heart into a thousand pieces as if it were made of paper. There, he was left staring, until a hand covered his eyes and brought his vision to complete darkness.

In his ears, he clearly heard the heavy breathing of the owner of the hand, and after a few minutes, that you were left looking at the scene in astonishment, you snapped out of it and told him that you would take him away from there and proceeded to pull him away, your palm that still was covering his eyes, enabling you suddenly feeling the warm tears that flowed from Jimin's eyes, as he didn't say a word, but let you guide him away for a few steps then he pulled that hand away from him and started walking faster further ahead so that you wouldn't see his face.

And you just stood and watched him go, knowing full well that he needed his time to be alone. But the truth was that you also needed time alone because for some reason, the scene between Seon and Jungkook, had made your chest get engulfed in aching pain.

A heavy feeling, like a slab, was placed on your chest, and a knot started forming on your throat that stung with every breath you inhaled, making you suddenly have the urge to shed tears too.

But you weren't the only one that was feeling that kind of pain, as Jungkook also had these feelings at that moment, once Seon had stopped him from doing anything further and without hesitation had told him the truth about how she felt under his touch.

"I'm sorry. This is the proof Jungkook. As it turned out just now, it's just impossible anymore...There's no going back for us... I hope you get over it one day. I Honestly hope you get to be okay, someday."

---To be continued...