What is it paradise without Newt

(Thomas's point of view)

After Brenda knew she wasn't getting any more out of me she left me alone and after she left I headed straight for the memorial.
It took me five minutes to get there when I'm walking so I decided to run .
When I got to the part of the jungle with thicker trees and all of the tomb stones my mission was the find the correct one . There was so many it took almost fifteen minutes to find the one I was looking for but finally I did. I took a seat on the floor in front of a great big boulder that we used as the tomb stones and engraved in it said

Chuck
Great friend
Our little brother
Will be remembered by all.

I haven't visited the others as much as I did Chucks , He was my first friend I made when I came out of the box , He was always there to cheer every Glader up when they were feeling down . Well everyone except Gally he is always miserable.
"Chuck I wish you were here" I said with a lump in my throat .
"I did something really bad ... Just like Gally did to you . I need help Chuck please help me" but as I spoke the lump grew bigger and I exploded in to tears . "Chuck I have done something and I wish I hadent . He is never coming back" okay I need to breath now "Chuck I-I-I killed a friend . " I couldn't hold back to tears.
"He had the flare and he was the only one who wasn't immune like us . He was your friend to . He was everyone's friend and I killed him." I started rocking back and fourth again "Chuck it was Newt ... I killed Newt . He was a Crank and I saw him in the street and I stopped the van. I shouldn't of stopped the van but I did because I saw Newt and he saw me and knew I was a friend of his so he backed away ... I got closer and the next thing I know he is on top of me screaming at me telling me why he has that limp."
I know Chuck can't hear me but maybe he can maybe he was watching down on us . But it helped to say it out loud .
" I was scared about what he was going to do so I reached for my gun but he saw... He saw and pulled it to his head , right between the eyes but I was still holding it . He starts saying about the note he gave me . Chuck he wanted me to kill him before he was past the gone , but I failed." Memory's of Newt came flooding back to me as I spoke . " then h- h- he starts shouting at me KILL ME ,KILL ME ! Non stop and each time it got louder until he was screaming KILL ME!!!!!!!! Before I kill you !!!! But all I said was I can't that is all I said because he wouldn't listen when I told him we could lock him and come with us and then he said do it before I become one of them ... KILL Me ! . And then Newts eyes cleared as if had gained one last trembling gasp of sanity,and his voice softened.And he said Please ,Tommy.Please and with his heart falling into black abyss , I pulled the trigger .I closed my eyes because I didn't want to see my best friend die ,but I heard the impact of the bullet on flesh and bone and felt Newts body jerk and fall on to the street. Then I ran and never told anyone but you Chuck"

I never knew someone could produce so many tears but I found then that you could .After I told Chuck what happened I stood up to leave and he was stood there next to the tree with even more tears than me . "Minho i-" he looked down at the floor and back at me . "You killed Newt !!!! You !!!! My best friend !!!!! Killed our best friend !!!!! And the only person you tell is a rock !!!!!!! HOW COULD YOU THOMAS !!!!!!!"