Embrace The Chords & Strings | ZEROBASEONE

TW: There is mention of physical abuse.

"This stage was actually Artist Battle's intermediate evaluation." His lungs wanted to pump itself in and out of life when the staff told them that. The familiar faces before them — one that stood as their anchors — were evaluating them. And all the security they could've had would burn up in flames.

The cards were in leader Zhang Hao's hands. He sat in between the leader and Ricky, his hands clasped to his legs as Hao opened the evaluation sheets first. His expression only worries them at the news if it would be good news or bad news. But his actions of reading it aloud startled them.

The boy's eyes tearing itself up had caused a spur of emotions to run in their bodies, not knowing what to do or what to say. But as he started reading the continuing parts, it was revealed that the evaluations were more from the heart of the guardians. The make-up they had smudging against one's face — almost liking being stripped bare like the love given by the people who wrote on the paper.

"I wondered if I would be able to keep continuing as a trainee, and if I would really be able to become an idol." Hao's words had broken his mask into pieces, he didn't see a world without Zhang Hao competing in Boys Planet 999 and sinking into the hearts of everyone. "I was only able to reach this point because they kept telling me that I will be able to succeed." Even though his words slurred in some parts due to the rising feelings, June felt like he understood the older boy's words more than ever. "I have to debut."

The other boys opened in the same way with each word they read out. Vulnerability soaked into the room, nothing but an absent façade present in each one. He had to keep his hands close by the other's shoulders or squeezing their hands as they choked out the words. June knew that when it fell into his hands, he can unfold the same way. But no imaginary situation can mimic the actual event.

His card was last and when Kuan Jui handed it to him, he almost wanted to slap it away. The fingers that reached out already trembled in fear but he directed his muscles to receive it and open the page to his own. The handwriting already drawing his breath to silence, knowing that it was Leon who wrote his evaluation.

"Younger brother June, you've grown up. I met you at around fourteen or fifteen, hiding behind the main designer. You didn't want to reveal it was your voice I heard but all your noonas pushed you out — and I caught sight of one of the most courageous, most talented, and most deserving young boy. And I am so happy that you find the voice to speak for your talents.

I am so proud of you. I hope you know that my love for you as my brother reaches a level wherein I name you an Ahn, my family surname. Finish the competition strong and enter the hearts of more people. Love, your big brother in LH."

He grew up lonely. The world without social connection made him a cocoon of a person, trying to do the greatest things for an ounce of love. And it took him a long time to grow to love other people — often they loved him first before he could ever name the emotions. And one of the people who made themselves his ideal family figure was Leon. If it hadn't been for him, he thinks he won't even be living today.

The words he said out loud had caused so many questions in the others. His story unfolded more in one comment or letter than their whole stay together. But they didn't hold anything against, especially that when they gazed at him right now, he looked like a lost child. A young person who has nothing besides the clothes they wear now and a heart on their sleeve.

In other times, it was a silent command to leave things alone. People won't know anything more than what was spilled by accident. But his softening hold on the card accompanied by his voice, breathy and airy, lifted the barrier between them all. "I'll speak of the bigger picture soon. This evening." As he said these words with shaky tones and slurring rhymes, Zhang Hao leaned to put his head on June's shoulder even after the camera cuts out.