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"I'm gettin' tired," you yawned, turning the corner with Tal on your motor scooters, "Let's find Dipshit and head home."
Columbus had graduated from Doofus to Dipshit on Year 3 of your travels together when he nearly crashed a car because he was too busy staring at Wichita.
"I hear ya," he nodded in agreement, feeling quite tuckered himself.
Until suddenly, a gunshot echoed through the hallway.
It was the sound of a shotgun.
You and Tally turned to each other in sync, knowingly.
'Columbus.'
Quickly, the both of you drew your guns, scooting over to the Yankee Candle.
Only to turn and see Columbus hugging some girl in a pink parka.
'The fuck?'
"Don't mind me," Tal sighed, tucking his gun back in his holster.
"Who is this?" You asked, cocking a brow at the curly-haired boy.
"Oh, hello," he realized, the two of them slowly breaking their hug, "This is Tallahassee and Jersey. Tallahassee and Jersey, Madison."
"Aw, are these your parents?" She asked with a ditsy smile.
"For fuck's sake," you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.
There was no way you looked that old.
Right?
"Slightly older, better-looking friend," Tal corrected, just as pissed as you were.
"Cute," she looked the both of you up and down.
"You live here?" he asked, deciding to change the subject.
"No, Paul Blart. I live in the freezer in Pinkberry, mm-hm," she shook her head, "It keeps the zombies out, though it is awfully chilly."
"Did you ever consider turning it off?" You cock a brow.
"Couldn't find the switch, like, anywhere. Just hoping the electricity would run out."
"It's amazing. As long as it rains, the dams give us power," Columbus chimed.
"Apparently not brain power."
Madison turned around, her smile immediately falling.
"I feel like you're being super judgy. Like, I'm getting a real anti-me vibe off of you."
