_TOMORROW NEVER CAME. [jakehoon]

⸺ tw: suicidal thoughts.

Jake nervously sat in his cell room, nipping at the skin of his fingers as he anxiously waited for Sunghoon and the others to return.

He had spent the whole day out in the sun, tediously uprooting and mapping out their current crops, genuinely astonished at how they managed to survive this long with their painstakingly small amount of knowledge.

It took his mind off most things - being busy was a good thing, so Jake wasn't too mad about all the labour work he had to do today, yet now that he's all showered up and squeaky clean on his and Sunghoon's joint bed, an unpleasant wave of anxiety settled in the air.

The sun had already set and even some of the residents had gone to bed, apart from the watch crew and a few other members inside the juvie.

Jake lay fidgeting on the bed, hating how his mind immediately jumped to the worst possible scenario. He knows Sunghoon can fight, he knows he can handle a gun and is strong enough to keep himself and other people safe, yet Jake's mind keeps flashing certain images where Sunghoon is not safe and sound.

"You okay?" Jake glances up to find Sunoo looking at him with worried eyes, "Are you also worried?"

The brunette nods and Sunoo comes to join him on the bed, "Maybe we can keep each other company whilst we wait."

Jake smiles in gratitude and sits up properly.

"You and Sunghoon sure made yourselves cosy in here," Sunoo teased, gesturing towards the joint bed as he sat down, "it's pretty cute to see Hyung being so happy and caring."

Jake could only nod in agreement, "He's really sweet."

"Yeah, he's always been like that," the younger pursed his lips, "that idiot would take care of anyone but himself."

"How long have you known Sunghoon?" Jake lifted his knees up and rested his chin on them as he listened to Sunoo.

"We actually met at the refugee camp. That's also where I met Jungwon and Jay Hyung, but as you can see, the camp got destroyed to bits and we had to flee once more. We somehow all ended up together and it was us against the world ever since - huddled up together in the cold winter nights, walking and searching day and night just to find some scraps of food, honestly, I think I would've given up if it wasn't for the rest of them," Sunoo laughed to himself, "times were so tough that I thought a bullet to the head would be less torturous."

"I'm sorry," Jake reached out his hand to hold Sunoo's, "I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

"It's better now, obviously," Sunoo squeezed his hand reassuringly, "and it wasn't just me who struggled. Jungwon Hyung is prone to allergy attacks - there were some cases where we thought this was it; it's so scary to think he wouldn't be here with us right now because we just don't have the resources. Jay Hyung and his dumb hero complex have sacrificed themselves more than a few times, hell, I'm grateful every day that I see him walking around because there were times I thought I'd never see him again."

"And Sunghoon Hyung," Jake shuffled closer, resting his head on Sunoo's shoulder to provide him with some comfort, "he loves us so much...did you know his sister was with us for a huge chunk of the time?"

Jake's heart squeezed painfully as he shook his head. Sunghoon mentioned having a sister but never talked about her since.

"Ah, well, it's definitely not my place to tell, but I'm sure you can put two and two together...he was never the same after that."

Jake felt his eyes prick with tears, his longing for Sunghoon only growing stronger by the minute, "Sunghoon Hyung didn't talk and didn't eat for what felt like months, Jay Hyung had to force-feed him and keep him alive because Hyung refused to keep going."

"But," Sunoo wiped away the tears that formed and leaned his head on Jake's, "we made it and we're still here. And we found you and everyone else along the way, so some sacrifices are worth it."

Jake hugs Sunoo tight, "All of you are so strong."

"You are too, Hyung. We're lucky to have you with us."

"Trust me," Jake chuckled wetly, "I'm the lucky one."

They stayed embraced for some time, finding deep comfort in each other's arms as they reminisced. Jake's shoulders feel heavier after learning about his friends' past lives - it's sometimes hard to forget that they're not just lone survivors. They're humans, they're people who had dreams, families and incredible ambitions. They're humans who have fears and worries and are fighting their own battles each day. Jake holds on to Sunoo tighter as he lets out a shuddered breath - he hopes he can become a person all of them lean on because through all the pain and heartache they've been through, they'll forever be the people who saved him. He wants to repay them more than anything.