It All Started In A McDonald's...

cute little filler chapter with minimal trauma uncovered

"You're so dramatic," I said, casually tugging at my collar because it was itchy as fuck. "Don't tell me, you can literally melt now?"

"Not with this spell," he said, and I looked at him like an idiot. Because I have no idea what he's saying here. He looks back at me blankly for a few seconds before saying, "Fuck, you meant melting as a metaphorical Midgardian saying, didn't you?"

"You can literally melt?" I repeated, seriously this time. My eyebrows rose of their own accord. "So you do have a weakness, huh?"

"I can't with this spell," he repeated, hissing as though concerned someone was watching us. Then again, I guess he does have the worry of another god watching over him all the time (who I'm still convinced is made up). "Don't go telling anyone. OK?"

"Alright, man, I gotchu," I said. He didn't calm down any but did look away from me. "Ain't it normal for Asgardians then? Another of your quirks?"

"No, it isn't normal," he hissed. "It didn't matter on Asgard, 'cos Asgard's half the temperature of New York, so no one knew about it, not even me, until..." he trailed off, like trying to think of how to finish that. I never see him stumble over his words this much so it's definitely weird. And a bit concerning. "Anyway, like I said before. Adopted."

"You aren't Asgardian, are you?" I realised, and I hadn't even known the thought was in my head til I'd said it out loud. I only recognised what I'd said when I noticed the way he was looking at me. "Shit, I gotchu."

"Yeah," he said, awkwardly, averting his gaze and pursing his lips. "I mean, I was raised there. That wasn't a lie. But biologically, no."

"Ah," I nodded slowly. "That's cool though man. I ain't gonna judge you for that. So what are you?"

"Biologically, Jotun," he said. Strangely enough, I think I've actually heard that term in mythology before. Loki notices me scrunch my face up as I try to place the word. "AKA Frost Giant. Jotunheim probably used to be the second most powerful Realm after Asgard. Lot of friction between the two."

"Wait, giants?" I repeated, confused. I looked Loki over. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's pretty tall, but not so tall you'd call him a giant. "Bro, you're 6'2."

"They cast me out because I'm a midget," he said, flatly. "At least, I think so. There's no records of my existence, so."

"How tall are Jotuns then?" I asked, still stuck on that part. All I could see was the giants from the BFG in my head. In winter.

"Average adult height?" Loki thought about this for a couple moments. "Mm, probably about ten feet. Ish." I raised my eyebrows. That was pretty terrifying. "Bio dad was about thirteen feet."

I looked up at the sky for some reason, trying to fathom that. "Dude." I looked back at Loki. "Wait a minute, you just said your bio dad. How'd you know about him then? I'm invested in your life story."

But at this point, he forced his face into a strained smile and carried on looking at the sun. "Ah. Well."

"I'm sensing there's trauma and I shouldn't have asked," I nodded. "My bad."

"I wouldn't say trauma," he debated to himself. "And I might as well tell you anyway. Basically, in the tenth century, Asgard and Jotunheim had a big war and shit. Asgard left them half-obliterated. The All-Bastard found this abandoned kid and decided he'd be a great token of alliance in the future between the two Realms, until it was proved Asgardians could only see Jotuns as monsters, so those ideas didn't matter anymore. But the kid didn't find out til after they were on the brink of another Asgard-Jotunheim war and discovered he was one of the monsters parents told their children about at night." I was staring at him. He just gave me a thumbs up and a sarcastic grin.