splatoon x reader (yeah i know its such a creative title)

so back when i was 5, my sexy teacher that had a thick ass gave my whole class an assignment where we would need to write down what we would want our future jobs to be! most people wrote stuff like dentist, firefighter and police officer but i always wrote: organ trafficker

WOAH! 3.2K reads!?

im pretty sure thats the highest amount that any splatoon story has EVER had like ever!

i feel so sigma

Agent 4 pov:

Agent 4: Oh boy! i sure do wanna commit suicide right now!

The annoyed Y/N stood at the entrance of her room, tapping his foot impatiently while the hungover, 4 was moaning and groaning in pain and agony in her bed.

Y/N: Told you, you shouldn't have drank so much alcohol yesterday!

Agent 4: You cant even comprehend how terrible i feel right now...............

Y/N: Welp get up! we gotta go in a few minutes and i do NOT wanna have Marie yell at us for being a minute too late!

Agent 4: *groooaaannn* Just tell her we both got hit by a truck or somethin!

Y/N: Could you just get out of bed? it's not that hard.

Agent 4: Make me!

Y/N: Oh i swear, i will in a sec!

He stepped towards her as she laid under the covers but she just looked up at him with a smirk

Agent 4: I sleep naked, so be my guest!

After she said this, Y/N stepped back

Y/N: ....Never mind.... guess i'll go save the world without you and get allll the credit for it!

This made agent 4 visibly agitated

Agent 4: UGH! you know what? FINE! I'll go! Just wait for me in the limo! i'll be down in a few...

Y/N: yipeeee! I knew that would work!

~~~

Y/N left the mansion and walked towards the parked limo and once he stepped in, the limo driver immediately started talking

Limo Driver: Hot dog! i've been waiting all night for you to come!

Y/N: Uhhhhh ok?

Limo Driver: I'm gonna be your NEW fruity friend along your journey!!!

Y/N: What the hell are you on about?

He was confused as to who this random ass new limo driver was because he knew for a fact that this wasn't the old one

Limo Driver: Fuck! i forgot to introduce myself! first name: Limo. last name: Driver! PLEASED to meet you!

Y/N: I Didn't know pearl hired a new  limo driver...

Limo Driver: She had to get a new one when the old one conveniently disappeared...

Y/N: What do you mean he disappeared?

Limo Driver: Oh you wanna know how I "made him disappear"?

Y/N: No not really

Limo Driver: Wow your so boring! Like imagine not wanting to hear m-

As he was about to say more meaningless stuff. Agent 4 crashed through the limo window

Y/N: AH! What the hell?!