WANT YOU ~ sequel

Kibous pov ~

A week. That's how long its been since I found out my mother died. We had the funeral Saturday and I hadn't cried once not once since figuring it out .I couldn't and I didn't know why it was as if my heart was breaking and also not breaking all at once .she hadn't really been a mother for me growing up she acted like one at some point but soon after I turned 16 she had gotten ruder and mean and hit me around sometimes and when I got older it was always just money she was after . 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒚. Perhaps it wasn't that I was sad she died but that I couldn't fix our relationship before she died I had tried every year since me and Einar had gotten married even when we adopted kids to give her a chance to get to know me better and get to know my kids but she just wouldn't cooperate always saying the same thing " our relationship would be better if you gave me some money " .

I curled up hugging myself in one of Einars big sweaters I was numb. I was hurt . I was in pain
I felt a single tear go down my face and I immediately wiped it away and blinked back any tears that threatened to spill from my eyes.
I knew everyone was worried about me even Aliza and nates parents were worried after hearing what happened after I fainted.

I hadn't cooked anything all week and I hadn't changed out of Einars sweater all week I hadn't talked verbally all week I hadn't even got in the shower all week I was bound to the couch the house was quiet with Einar at work and the kids gone I knew they were leaving because they couldn't handle the sight of me like this because some nights they didn't even come home claiming they had to study with friends.

Einar had tried his best to get me to talk I only stared at him blankly and never opened my mouth.i felt bad. Was it normal to feel this way ?

I got up from the couch heading to the restroom it was the only place I'd been other than the couch I avoided looking into the mirror and when I got done handling my business i washedy hands with the lavender scented soap and naturally lifted my eyes to the mirror I was disgusted with my appearance my hair was the greasiest looking it has ever been and when I opened my mouth and blowed my breath into my hands I almost passed out again my eyes were bloodshot red not from crying from stress and no sleep I slammed my hands on the sink gripping it out of frustration

She was making me unravel I wasn't being myself I knew that. But I didn't know how to convert myself back to normal I was tired of my stinch and decided to finally take a shower brushing my teeth first I got in the shower when I turned the water on I screamed at how hot the water was backing away from it terrified I was shaking and I did not believe it was from just the water it was burning hot yes but my mind was still swirling and my head hurt I felt dizzy I couldn't see anything and the next thing I know I'm seeing black all black and the hot water was still stinging my skin