Where The Stars Fade

Chapter 1

"Taro." He replied with a smile.

He went to find his seat, while I go to the coffee machine to brew his coffee.

I've been doing this for almost a year now, and this is so much better and it's peaceful. I visit Nana-san at the orphan house once every weekend, to see how she's doing, and meet some kids, and new ones...

I see myself in them when I was one, I felt lonely, no one wanted to talk to me, no one even dared to come close, except Nana-san. She's the kindest and sweetest. And that one boy, who used to protect me, I don't remember his name. Though, I still remember he always protects me from other kids even though I always keep ignoring him.

Ever since I only choose the people who I want to become close with. Jinko-san and Rie, their getting closer to me, day by day.

After I was done with the man's order, I called out his name and he took his order and went back to his seat.

Minutes later, customers starts to chime in really fast, since it's getting colder. I forced myself to smile each customer, but why do I force myself?

The scar it left me still burns, and, I don't know anymore.

After the long shift. We clocked out in the afternoon and the night shifters came in to replace our work. Jinko-san and Rie said goodbye to me, as always. I don't usually engage first, I hate it when I do that.

I go to work at 7:30 in the morning, and clock out at 4:00 pm during the weekdays. I work at 4:00pm to 11:00 pm during weekdends, which was fair enough. They pay me fair salary, and a good environment as well. It's just that I have to keep bearing a smile with these customers everyday.

I went to a grocery store first, to buy food for my dinner, since I'm also running out. I'm trying to save up, I don't know what for though. So I just have to buy some ramen noodles, and some cat foods for Mitto, even though he still refuses to enter my apartment.

I gave him that name when I don't even know if he has an owner, but I don't care.

I paid for my stuff and went out the grocery store. I walked and walked, out of space just like everyday of my life. I held the bags like I carried the world. I don't know why.

I don't know what makes me happy, I guess Mitto is the only one that makes me happy.

When I got home, I opened the gate and saw him sleeping on the table on my front yard. I smiled, the first smile I did this day.

I didn't feel proud and I just left Mitto there. I went inside my apartment and dropped my things on the couch. I opened the TV to watch some entertainment but I need to water the plants first. So I went out to the front yard.

I noticed Mitto was already gone, he's outside the gate again. He probably noticed that I'm home and waiting for his food again.

"It's not dinner time yet, Mitto." I said over the gate.

I walked over to the faucet and turned it on, and I started watering the plant.
After I finished, I went back inside to watch the TV show I opened. Though I don't usually watch TV, they just make my electricity bill high.

Later that night, I was getting a bit hungry, so I decided to cook the ramen I bought. I turn on the stove and boiled some water with the noddles.

I stared at it like I'm stuck in this cycle, it's blurry and vast. Until I heard Mitto meowing outside my house.

Hes probably hungry

I lowered the heat from the stove to stop the water from boiling too much and grabbed the cat food from the bag and quickly went outside the house.

There, I saw him sitting like a good boy outside the gate. "You must be hungry huh, you hadn't had lunch right, Mitto?" I said as I petted it's head.

Meow~~

I giggled a bit, and started pouring his food into the bowl. "Eat all of that huh Mitto?" I said as I stood back up.

I went inside and closed the gate, hoping that Mitto, would finally come inside my apartment. I didn't know I crave a little attention from a companion.

I went back to the kitchen and turned off the stove, the noodles were already cooked. I served it into a bowl with some rice and placed it onto the table.

After placing it, I went inside my bedroom to get something, my journal. I have been writing my everyday life in that book not too long ago, even though I know it's boring. But I like how I keep my life inside a book.

I went back to the kitchen table and sat down. I opened the book and started writing, as I waited for my food to cool down a bit.

October 13, 2023 Tuesday

I woke up this morning and saw Mitto outside the gate again, I fed him but he refused to come into my apartment and be my pet. I saw Ayako-san again outside his bench, smoking and reading a newspaper in a cold like he does everyday. I walked to the Café to work, and that's all. Customers come and go, and I forced myself to smile. After that shift I went to the grocery first to buy dinner food, some ramen. Because I'm saving up, for probably future needs, like rent, bills, and any other else. I fed Mitto tonight, and I'm about to eat too.

After writing, I turned the pages to last, to hold the picture of them. My Mom and Dad... and me. All happy together, when I was 10.

I hugged it for a while, and put it back inside the book and closed it. I set it aside and started eating.

I went to bed later that night, I smiled twice. It was all because of Mitto. What would make me smile when Mitto is not there? What do I like doing that makes me happy?

I don't know...